Online shopping is now replacing shopping in the store. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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Currently, shopping on the web is gradually surpassing the traditional way of shopping. I personally support the tendency because online shopping mostly has benefits. In

this

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essay, I’m going to explicitly highlight the main points why I consider online shopping positive.

To begin

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with, online shopping offers plenty of convenience

such

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as various categories and choices.

For instance

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, a customer who wants to buy a pair of shoes can browse plenty of websites and choose the most relevant one,

whereas

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, in terms of traditional shopping, it’s relatively more difficult as they are bound to visit particular stores

such

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as Adidas or Nike. In fact,

while

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online stores ensure delivery, distant sales take away the expenses regarding the visit to the shopping centres.

Additionally

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, the vast majority of people agree that it may be stressful to check the products in a store

while

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the shop assistants somewhat psychologically persuade them to purchase particular merchandise. Shopping under pressure leads to a serious sense of dissatisfaction which is not the case in shopping online. On top of that, online sales open up more and more opportunities

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its various digital features.

Firstly

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, a customer is able to explicitly compare prices with the comparison function made by general shopping websites.

Secondly

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, by shopping online it is almost impossible not to find a particular product as there is a significant search engine which automatically finds a massive range of goods worldwide.

Besides

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, shopping online directly contributes to the global economy

as well as

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small stores overseas.

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, the rating and feedback properties in shopping on the web make it easier for customers to decide whether to purchase the product or not, and consider the points that might be irrelevant.

To conclude

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, shopping via the Internet offers a lot more benefits than drawbacks.

This

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is because it meets the basic needs of customers

such

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as saving time and money.

rustem.byevWed Oct 18 2023

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Task Achievement

While your essay provides a thorough exploration of the topic, incorporating more specific examples could elevate the task achievement score even further. Consider including personal anecdotes or cited studies to bolster your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

For an even stronger essay, ensure a seamless flow between paragraphs by enhancing transitional phrases. This fine-tuning can bridge ideas more smoothly, contributing to the coherence and cohesion of your writing.

Introduction

Your introduction effectively sets up the essay, clearly stating your stance on the topic.

Supported Main Points

The essay demonstrates a strong ability to present supported main points, contributing significantly to its persuasive power.

Conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the essay's main arguments, reinforcing your position.

Use of Examples

Your use of examples, such as the comparison of online and traditional shopping experiences, is effective in illustrating your points.

14
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

314 words

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Online shopping is now replacing shopping in the store. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

Many children these days face difficulties to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the causes of this situation? What could be the possible solutions?

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