The charts below show the results of a survey about what people of different age groups say makes them most happy. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The pie diagram illustrates the distribution of various factors that are mainly responsible for making people more happy in numerous age gaps.

Overall

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, success at the workplace and performing their favourite jobs are most prominent

while

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economic issues, journeys, and many more factors

also

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help

public

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the public

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to become happy.

Firstly

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, the proportion of prospects in job sectors is 31% when society

are

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under 30

however

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, the part is 32% when they become over 30. The case of fulfilling hobbies at the same age shows a similar trend

whereas

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the percentage increases by 2% from low to high age.

On the other hand

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crowd

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the crowd

a crowd

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who are under 30 prefer to travel more around the world,

in contrast

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, whenever they reach the 30, they try to spend more moments with their family and the proportion is 15% and 14% respectively.

In addition

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, economic issues are highly significant in making a person happy and the results shown in the chart where that folk over 30 consider more financial security. At the same time, there are other issues which help a person to be happy but these values decreased over time, from 14% to 10%.

Submitted by sadikasharmin888 on Thu Oct 19 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

191 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

survey
age groups
responses
happiness factors
participants
contribute
compare
patterns
differences

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The charts below show the results of a survey about what people of different age groups say makes them most happy. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

It’s generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance, music and sport and others are not. However, it’s sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sportsperson or musician. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

Teenagers should have regular exams at secondary school as this will prepare them better for life after leaving school. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is generally agreed that society benefits from the work of its members. Compare the contributions of artists to society with the contributions of scientists to society. Which type of contribution do you think is valued more by your society? Give specific reasons to support your answer.

Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?