Childrem are facing more pressure nowdays from academic social and commercial prespective what are the causes of these pressure and what measure should be taken to reduce these.

#childrem #pressure #nowdays #prespective #measure

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays,

children

Use synonyms

are demanded to be better in academic aspects and

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

competive

Correct your spelling

competitive

individual in work. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will elaborate more

about

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the cause

show examples

cause

Fix the agreement mistake

causes

show examples

and

measure

Fix the agreement mistake

measures

show examples

towards

this

Linking Words

phenomenon. The main cause of

this

Linking Words

issue

that

Add a missing verb

is that

show examples

some schools implement long hours for study and

given

Wrong verb form

give

show examples

many

task

Change to a plural noun

tasks

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

children

Use synonyms

. It is followed by

Use synonyms

parents

Change noun form

parents'

parent's

show examples

desire to create their

children

Use synonyms

to be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

competitive

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

and better than them in the future. Sometimes they have to learn more about what their

parents

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as making a calculation of business income

Change preposition

at in

show examples

Correct your spelling

show examples

early age. It is of course a personal intention from their

parents

Use synonyms

that

encourage

Correct subject-verb agreement

encourages

show examples

them to be ready

performing themselves

Verb problem

to perform

show examples

for the future challenge.

Parents

Use synonyms

should give a balance between study and play for their

children

Use synonyms

. It is important because

children

Use synonyms

would get

stress

Wrong verb form

stressed

show examples

if they do not have enough space to entertain themselves.

For example

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

could bring their

children

Use synonyms

playground

Add an article

the playground

a playground

show examples

where they could play with other

children

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

approach could generate

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

better development for their

children

Use synonyms

. Another point is government should make a regulation about study hours in school that becomes a burden for

children

Use synonyms

. It is

also

Linking Words

intended to give more space

Use synonyms

children

Change preposition

for children

show examples

with their

parents

Use synonyms

at home. In conclusion, the desire to create a competitive person is a main cause of the issue which impacts

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the school curriculum.

However

Linking Words

, it could not appropriate to be implemented for

children

Use synonyms

because they need to enjoy their life

Change preposition

show examples

that age.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Thu Oct 19 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

248 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
In many countries women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent years, there has been an increase in females who do not regard marriage as a necessary part of their lives anymore. While I agree that financial independence can explain this phenomenon, I consider that education also plays a key role in it.
4
band
In today's globalized world, people from different cultures often come into contact with each other. How do cultural differences affect commucation? What can be done to improve cross-cultural communication?
Globalizaton has normalized people from intercultural background to communicate with each other. Additionally, with the rise of non-speaking country population in learning english, it is easiear nowadays for people from different culture to communicate in english. To increase communication between two different culture, learning third language aside from native and english is encouraged.
5.5
band
Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The advancements of public infrastructure hold significant importance for city layout and environmental sustainability. In my view, I strongly agree with the statement that more money should be allocated by governments for the railway system.
5
band
Some people think that sport is very important for society. Others, however, argue that it is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Prominence of physical activity in society nowadays is clear to many people. However, there are a few that assume sports as an activity which people have just fun. Although exercise can be delightful in many cases, I and the majority of people believe doing sports can promote a healthy community and even bring fame and to have a lucrative job.
5.5
band
During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter remind him when and where you met tell him what kind of job you are interested in say why you think you would be suitable for the job
We had the pleasure of sitting next to each other during a flight from Ottawa to Los Angeles on the 14 th of August.I enjoyed our conversation and also you suggested I contact you about job opportunities.

Childrem are facing more pressure nowdays from academic social and commercial prespective what are the causes of these pressure and what measure should be taken to reduce these.

Your opinion

In many countries women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today's globalized world, people from different cultures often come into contact with each other. How do cultural differences affect commucation? What can be done to improve cross-cultural communication?

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that sport is very important for society. Others, however, argue that it is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.