It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture. We can learn as much as from books, films and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #travel #places #culture #books #films #internet

In modern society, there are many ways to learn about other cultures through books, films, and the Internet.

As a result

, it is optional to visit different locations. It is not the best option,

although

other methods can gain local knowledge. For one thing,

people

visit other

places

to get more local

culture

:If any magazine does not include all the details, the authors write themselves, but the

culture

probably needs to be improved.There are many fun activities in the travel place, and if you can go there, you will gain a particular knowledge.You must go there and eat local delicious food.

On the other hand

people

go to different

places

to visit, they will improve local business, the government will have more money, and they will protect more cultural

places

. For one thing, many films are made using local cultural museums. Another reason for

this

opinion is that some pictures are taken photos in

culture

building.

Last

but not least, many story details describe domestic famous cultural content.

Nevertheless

, books, films, and the Internet can help

people

know more about other

places

. In conclusion,

people

travel so that we can know more, and at the same time, more money can protect more history and

culture

so that the writer can write them to the media; even so, other

places

' cultures get them very quickly.

Submitted by erichardxin on Thu Oct 19 2023

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task response

Ensure that the examples provided directly support the main points and are relevant to the topic.

coherence cohesion

Work on creating a more organized and logically connected structure for the essay. Use clear transition words to connect ideas.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas more effectively. Use more precise and sophisticated language.

grammatical range

Review and practice the use of complex grammatical structures, accurately use verb tenses, and ensure subject-verb agreement.

Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

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Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

224 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural immersion
authentic experiences
diverse perspectives
comprehensive
historical context
facilitates
sensory and emotional depth
holistic understanding
cultural bias
stereotypes
discernment
virtual reality
convenience of access

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It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture. We can learn as much as from books, films and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

There are currently many endangered species at risk of extinction and it’s equally important to save all of them. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The rise of social media platforms has made it easier for people to vent their frustrations and complaints publicly. What is the consequence of this trend? Is there any benefit to expressing complaints on social media?

In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in a specific area and separated them each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh disadvantages.

The fake news is becoming increasingly common in the era of social media. What problems will it cause to individuals and the society? Suggest some measures to deal with it.

Due to success of convenience food and ready-made meals, we are failing to pass on adequate culinary skills to the next generation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.