Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree.

#schools #focus #success #examinations #skills #cookery #woodwork #school #friends

It is expected that schools should devote more time

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academic subjects for better academic results rather than sparing time for extracurricular

activities

such

as cookery, dressmaking and many more. I firmly disagree with

such

a study pattern as these

activities

are as crucial as the academic subjects.

This

topic will explain the reasons for promoting non-scholastic

activities

Firstly

, the main reason for prompting after-school

activities

reducing

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to reduce

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boredom from the repeated daily schedule as these extras will act as a refreshment from the regular academic studies which will result in lost interest in studies.

Moreover

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Moreover,

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these

activities

will introduce

sense

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a sense

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of competitiveness with

higher

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a higher

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level

for

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patience and help in discovering hidden talents among the youth.

For

instance

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instance,

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recent surveys have shown that more

success-full

Correct your spelling

successful

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people have a good hold on

at-least

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at least

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one

such

activity, helping them

in retaining

Wrong verb form

retain

show examples

lost academic interest and success in both. Moving on, the

further

reason for encouraging

such

activities

is building good relations among companions by sharing common

interest

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interests

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and

common

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a common

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platform.

In addition

, students learn at

high

Correct word choice

higher

show examples

levels at school than family where they get less exposure and limited resources. Not only

this

but

such

extra

activities

also

help in protecting students from indulging in inappropriate

activities

and

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

career focused

Add a hyphen

career-focused

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with good character.

Last

Correct word choice

but

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not

the

Correct article usage

apply

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least, I would always support after-class

activities

as they will foster

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

new talent and shape the future youth in the best way possible

Submitted by mankiratgill03 on Sat Oct 21 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

239 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

academic success
passing examinations
cookery
dressmaking
woodwork
learn from family and friends
personalized learning environment
supportive learning environment
well-rounded education
school curriculum
resources
expert guidance
enhance creativity
problem-solving
teamwork

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Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

nuclear power is far too dangerous; therefore, countries should ban its use and concentrate instead on developing alternative sources such as hydroelectric power and solar energy. To what extent do you agree?

Many teenagers now have their own Smart phone. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this and give your own opinion.

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that we shouldn't be so dependent on computers. To what extent do you agree or disagree.