Computers are more advanced and they attract more children because of the high-end
games
itCorrect pronoun usage
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providesCorrect subject-verb agreement
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, getting addicted to them can be harmful.
In particular
, they can have much more cons to it than being a boon. I completely agree with the statement that video
games
could have negative effects on little ones.
Streaming
games
are becoming more popular among youngsters .
As a result
,they have
this
urge to play it at any cost.
Although
,Remove the comma
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there are some
games
that could stimulate our brain,kids are more indulged in violent
games
which in turn can damage their behaviour and
also
their thinking capability.
In particular
,kids could be more rude to others and could try to imitate a character in the game.
For instance
, a boy in America took guns to his school in order to avenge his buddies for bullying him.In fact ,
this
is Unnecessary verb
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could be
directAdd an article
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influence of violent
games
.
On the other hand
,youngsters are prone to health-related problems.
Due to
,over usage of laptops which could damage their body parts like eyes ,
back bone Correct your spelling
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,etc.
, they can make a career out of video
games
.
Consequently
, when they retire they will face some serious problems in their well-being.Owing to that fact, we should make students
be Unnecessary verb
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aware of the consequences and we need to implement some rules by doing so we can control
this injuriesChange the determiner
this injury
these injuries
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.Curfew could be
aChange the article
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best option for the kids.
While
,Remove the comma
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outdoor
games
could
also
be a better
.
For example
, in India mothers used to control their
childFix the agreement mistake
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by making up
some Correct quantifier usage
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bad stories about unhealthy things and
also
curfews .
Moreover
,encouraging them to play
outdoorReplace the word
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could
also
be fruitful.
To conclude
,we need to protect our
childrensCorrect your spelling
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from
thisCorrect determiner usage
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negative effects.In my opinion,it can be possible only by parents who can implement curfews and
restrictionFix the agreement mistake
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on using
gameFix the agreement mistake
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and endorsing more plays like football and baseball.