The age at which people have children has risen. Some people believe that because of this, families and countries will suffer some problems. What is your opinion?

In recent years, people tend to have children later than before. Some assert that
this
can result in negative consequences for families and countries. I partly agree with the assertion. There are some disadvantages to
this
phenomenon.
First,
the recent trend might harm mom and children’s health and put pressure on
society
.
According to
scientists, if individuals give birth at a late age, the possibility of giving birth to a disabled child is more likely to increase.
In addition
, it will take more time for the mother to recover, and parenting can be more physically challenging for them to do.
Moreover
, the phenomenon can accelerate an ageing
society
since the birth rate will decrease.
Furthermore
, nations are inflicted through
this
as well,
for instance
, the gross workforce is hampered
due to
the reduced amount of young individuals.
Secondly
, the economy plummets significantly
as a result
of less labour which eventually shuts down the companies, job opportunities and income tax.
Additionally
, if the population does not flourish there would be no re-enforcement or upgrading in the
society
and there would be a lack of any technological advancement in the nation.
However
, we cannot dismiss the advantages
this
can bring. Individuals are likely to enjoy their lives more, and they can fully focus on their lives since they have fewer responsibilities. They can study longer, and they can have various experiences.
Moreover
, from a social perspective, mature parents are more likely to provide a stable home to their children so that they can be well taken care of. In conclusion, I believe that
this
recent phenomenon has its advantages and disadvantages.
Although
people can enjoy their lives more by having various experiences,
this
can harm mothers' and babies’ health, putting pressure on
society
.
Submitted by gnlwnww on

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coherence cohesion
Consider adding a clear thesis statement to your introduction to clearly state your opinion on whether families and countries will suffer problems due to the rising age at which people have children.
coherence cohesion
In your conclusion, summarize your main points and provide a clear concluding statement that reflects your overall opinion.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and data to support your points. This will make your argument more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Consider organizing your ideas more logically. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the topic.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource of your essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Check for grammatical errors and improve sentence structures to improve grammatical range and accuracy.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • family dynamics
  • energy levels
  • financially stable
  • retirement savings
  • education funds
  • health risks
  • complications
  • declining birth rates
  • workforce
  • social services
  • aging population
  • life experience
  • emotionally prepared
  • financially prepared
  • responsibilities
  • parenthood
  • enriched environment
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