Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspective. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

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Nowadays, the majority of children are stressed related to their studies and social life.

This

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is mainly

due to

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high competition in studies, and parents' expectations related to kids' careers. It can be solved,

however

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, by implementing possible solutions namely, counselling, and time management and the following paragraphs will expatiate both stances with lucid examples. One of the main reason for the uppermost situation is the high competition between the students which push them to work hard and causes stress. 80% of university students in Canada,

for example

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, suffer from tension headaches and migraines at an early age owing to stressful environment.

Secondly

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, in a few countries

such

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as India, guardians are giving a hard time to the teenagers

while

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choosing a career namely, the doctor, and the lawyer. To explain

further

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, guardians feel ashamed if their kid is not having a white-collar job in the future.

Hence

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, they have high pressure on their mind. A possible solution to

this

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problem would be counselling of both parents and offspring to change their thinking ability.

In addition

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, it can be not only crucial for a child but

also

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for the father and mother as they are accepting the best for their loved ones. To give a clear example, in London, the majority of schools have counselling sessions biweekly to help them make significant decisions indeed extracurricular activities.

Moreover

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, making schedules in advance would be helpful in managing time for various exercises, especially for outdoor life which broadens their horizontal

as well as

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physical well-being. In schools, as an illustration, there should be gaps between the lectures to relax them by giving fun activities

such

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as music, and painting.

To conclude

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, there has been a big debate regarding stress, particularly in kids from various situations. Parental pressure and academic competition are considered the main reasons for

this

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issue.

Nevertheless

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, it can be mitigated by using suitable methods

such

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as counselling both guardians and youngsters and managing the schedule to do some extracurricular activities.

buttargurpinder73Sat Oct 21 2023

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coherence cohesion

You've done a good job developing a linear progression in your discussion. However, some connections between ideas and transitions could be smoother. Make sure to use cohesive devices appropriately to link your thoughts coherently.

task achievement

You've managed to answer all parts of the prompt, well done. Just a minor point: Be cautious not to oversimplify or generalize some ideas. While writing about causes, it might be better to give a wider range of reasons, and support them with specific examples. Your examples should reflect the breadth of the points you are making and be clearly linked to them.

lexical resource

Your vocabulary range is satisfactory, but there is a room for improvement. Incorporating more language variety can definitely improve your score. Even though less common vocabulary is used, the usage sometimes seems a bit forced and not always natural. Watch the collocations and word choice.

grammatical range and accuracy

Sentence structures you have used are appropriately varied. In some sentences, your grammaticality and punctuation are a bit off, sometimes making it a bit difficult to understand what you're trying to say. Ensure clarity and accuracy in your sentences, particularly with punctuation and word order.

15
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

pressures
academic
social
commercial
causes
measures
competition
expectations
influence
peer pressure
commercialization
marketing
play
leisure time

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Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspective. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for community. Why might be this is the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Write a letter to the course director. The cookery school has asked for your feedback on this course.

Lack of fresh water is becoming a global issue of increasing importance. what problems does this shortage cause? what measures could be taken to overcome these problems?

Newspapers will remain the main source of news in the future and the Internet will not have any effect. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

With the increasing use and development of new technology, many machine are new able to do the work which people used to perform. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?