More and more people are moving away from an agricultural background to relocate to cities in order to look for work. What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer?

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Majority of people

relocating

Wrong verb form

relocate

show examples

to urban

areas

Use synonyms

from rural

areas

Use synonyms

for employment

opportunities

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will explain reasons for

this

Linking Words

notion

such

Linking Words

as overcrowded city centre, mismanagement of infrastructure , law and

order

Use synonyms

etc and

also

Linking Words

explain remedial

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

such

Linking Words

grant

Fix the agreement mistake

grants

show examples

given by

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

to big corporate to set up

Use synonyms

business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

show examples

away from city life and availability of cheap

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

in rural

areas

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with,

firstly

Linking Words

, major

corporate

Replace the word

corporations

show examples

have set up their

business

Use synonyms

in metropolitan

cities

Use synonyms

therefore

Linking Words

many

individual

Change to a plural noun

individuals

show examples

are migrating to these

areas

Use synonyms

order

Use synonyms

to get better job

opportunities

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

leads to mismanagement

due to

Linking Words

overcrowded

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

which

further

Linking Words

leads

problems

Change preposition

to problems

show examples

maintenance

Add an article

the maintenance

show examples

of infrastructure.

For example

Linking Words

survey

Add an article

a survey

show examples

conducted by

Delhi

Correct article usage

the Delhi

show examples

Transport

department

Capitalize word

Department

show examples

indicated,

from

Change preposition

show examples

past

Correct article usage

the past

show examples

few years, more congestion

are

Wrong verb form

has been

show examples

noticed

Change preposition

show examples

roads

due to

Linking Words

cater spike in demand for

working

Correct article usage

the working

show examples

population as more public transport and private vehicles are required to commute to offices.

Secondly

Linking Words

, if more migration is expected in

long

Correct article usage

the long

show examples

run

then

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will create difficulty

for

Change preposition

show examples

managing law and

order

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

authorities. If mismanagement continues to happen in future,

then

Linking Words

will lead to detrimental effects To overcome

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

issue, there is strong intervention

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

authorities

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

required so that city life remains calm and peaceful.

Government

Correct article usage

The government

show examples

can take

number

Change the article

a number

the number

show examples

of steps

such

Linking Words

as impart

grant

Fix the agreement mistake

grants

show examples

to big industries to set up their venture in suburban or remote

areas

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, agencies should give leverage to

corporate

Replace the word

corporations

show examples

to start

Use synonyms

business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

show examples

in rural by

lower

Replace the word

lowering

show examples

taxes as

compare

Change the form of the verb

compared

show examples

to urban

cities

Use synonyms

Apart from

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, many advantages too in terms of cheap

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

and availability of raw materials in rural

areas

Use synonyms

. All these facilities, give ample atmosphere to start

Use synonyms

business

Add an article

a business

show examples

in remote

location

Fix the agreement mistake

locations

show examples

easily.

To conclude

Linking Words

, more migration from

agricultural

Add an article

the agricultural

show examples

sector to

cities

Use synonyms

for

Change preposition

show examples

search of jobs

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

leads to

misbalance

Correct article usage

a misbalance

show examples

in population control measures which

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

negatives

Change the noun form

negative

show examples

effects

Change preposition

show examples

society, infrastructure and law and

order

Use synonyms

in metropolitan

cities

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is imperative to take immediate measures by agencies to provide better

opportunities

Use synonyms

in rural

areas

Use synonyms

so that one can get better employment

opportunities

Use synonyms

in these

areas

Use synonyms

deep.amans86Sun Oct 22 2023

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Task Achievement

The essay does not fully address all parts of the task. It needs to provide a clear response to both consequences and solutions of people moving from agricultural background to cities for employment opportunities.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Additionally, the logical structure of the essay is not well-maintained. There is a need for better organization and coherence between paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The essay lacks advanced vocabulary and relies heavily on basic vocabulary. There is also a lack of variety in word choice and significant inaccuracies.

Grammatical Range

There are numerous grammatical errors throughout the essay. It is important to work on sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and subject-verb agreement.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

344 words

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More and more people are moving away from an agricultural background to relocate to cities in order to look for work. What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Some think that teaching children at home is more benefical for their development, while other say they should go to school.discuss the advantages of both views and give your presonal opinion

In some countries today, children are taught from a young age that competition is important and that winning is everything. Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people say that the best way to discourage smoking is to make smoking illegal in public places. Other people say that this is not enough and other measures are needed. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Nowadays more and more people are using media like TV or online platforms to read news instead of reading newspapers. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, people live with their parents and siblings until their old age. Do you think there are more advantages or disadvantages to this behaviour? Discuss your opinion and provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer.