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Band 4

should private schools receive government funding? give reason for your answer, and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

#schools #government #reason
Nowadays,
children
 play a vital role any any
nation
Change noun form
nation's
show examples
 development
therefore
parents
 need to give more freedom as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
. I ponder that, it is affirmative development and
I
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
my justification will come in
further
 paragraphs
along with
 some relative examples. To commence with, there are several positive things to give
freem
Correct your spelling
free
chindren
Correct your spelling
children
.
Firslty
Correct your spelling
Firstly
, they can easily learn new things very easily and with proper knowledge and guidance they become a good citizen.
Secondly
, it is not
beneficial
Rephrase
only beneficial
show examples
 for their
parents
 but
also
 for the
countries
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 economy will
boost
Wrong verb form
be boosted
show examples
 very easily.
Thirldy
Correct your spelling
Thirdly
,
children
 can achieve any goal they want to achieve in their lives.
For instance
, the majority of
children
 want to become
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
 person but
due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
parents
are not allow
Change the verb form
are not allowed
are not allowing
show examples
therefore
 they do not
beocme
Correct your spelling
become
 a sport person.
Furthermore
,
children
 find some kind of extra
responsiblity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 and become
independence
Replace the word
independent
show examples
 in their
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 show more
patient
Replace the word
patience
show examples
while
 doing something new.
Additonally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
, they can easily fulfil their family
members
Change noun form
members'
member's
show examples
requirement
Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
show examples
ean
Correct your spelling
and
 lots of money
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 their passion.
On the other hand
, if
children
 get more freedom
then
 they miss use of
this
 opportunity. They do not focus their study on their school time and easily disattracte and do other
acitivities
Correct your spelling
activities
such
 as
start
Verb problem
apply
show examples
drinking and smoking which can be not good for their future.
In addition
, they do not like to listen
their
Change preposition
to their
show examples
parents
Change noun form
parent's
parents'
show examples
advise
Replace the word
advice
show examples
 or
teacher
Change noun form
teacher's
show examples
 and waste
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their money and time. To give an overview, it is true that,
children
 need to require more freedom as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
 become at that time they
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
 easily learn some new
acitivites
Correct your spelling
activities
, do other
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 and many more.
Nevertheless
,
parents
 and
coach
Fix the agreement mistake
coaches
show examples
 should keep
on
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
 eye
that
Change preposition
on
show examples
 what they do in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Submitted by er.lerulal on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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