IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The diagram gives information about the process of making carbonated drinks. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The diagram gives information about the process of making carbonated drinks. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#information #process #drinks #summarise #features #comparisons
The diagram presents the
informarion
Correct your spelling
information
 related to
making
Correct article usage
the making
show examples
 process of carbonated beverages.
Overall
, there are five stages until it
stored
Add a missing verb
is stored
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the supermarket which are cleaning, heating, mixing, filtering, and packaging.
To begin
,
the first step is
 the raw
water
 filtered using
machine
Correct article usage
a machine
show examples
 before adding the softener and chemicals. In order to produce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
clean and healthy drinks, the
water
 needs to be heated in the electric heaters. After it has been heated, the
water
passess
Correct your spelling
passes
 through the cooling pipe to be given carbon dioxide. Entering
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
stage three where the sparkling
water
 is
adding
Wrong verb form
added
show examples
syroup
Correct your spelling
syrup
. flavour, and colour.
Then
, in
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
stage 4, the soda
water
 is
filtering
Wrong verb form
filtered
show examples
 through the machine and stored in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bottles and cans. The
last
 stage is
packaging
Correct article usage
the packaging
show examples
 process where both bottles and cans
were
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
 stored in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different
box
Fix the agreement mistake
boxes
show examples
. The products are ready to be delivered and purchased by customers in the supermarket.
Submitted by semangatbanget.s2 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: