Music is a good mean to gather people from different cultures together. Do you agree or disagree?

#music #people #cultures

It certainly cannot be denied that

music

is one of the excellent

medium

Fix the agreement mistake

mediums

show examples

to gather

people

from different cultures together .

This

happened mainly

due to

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

love for

music

. In my opinion,

this

argument surely holds water . In the upcoming

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will give you reasons why I

am agree

Change the verb form

agree

show examples

with

this

statement . There could possibly be a myriad of reasons for

this

,but here I would like to mention two key reasons.The first point that comes to mind is that In today's world

people

love

music

very much .So they listen

different

Change preposition

to different

show examples

types of

music

that is

listening

every

Change preposition

to every

show examples

part of the world .

For

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

I belong to

Hindi

Correct article usage

the Hindi

show examples

language

culture

but I like

western

Capitalize word

Western

show examples

music

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

and I learn different

language

Fix the agreement mistake

languages

show examples

by listening

music

Change preposition

to music

show examples

. And my favourite singer is

salena

Change the capitalization

Salena

show examples

gomez .

Due to

music

learn

Wrong verb form

learned

show examples

Change preposition

about western

show examples

western

Capitalize word

Western

show examples

culture

and can meet

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

English

spoken

Verb problem

apply

show examples

people

.Another point worth considering is that

music

is the one activity which is quite popular and many

people

like to

listen

Add the preposition

listen to

show examples

music

in their spare time and feel relaxed and chill because of

music

Music

connects different

background

Fix the agreement mistake

backgrounds

show examples

people

come together . Some

people

however

,might argue that

music

is not connecting

people

because they don't think we love different

culture

music

.A good example to explain is

this

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

normally

people

connect to their birth

language

more as

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

other

Change the wording

another language

other languages

show examples

language

. In conclusion, different

people

might feel differently about whether or not

music

is the one that connects different

culture

pupils together ,and both

Correct subject-verb agreement

seem

show examples

seems

Add the particle

seems to

show examples

have valid arguments to justify what they feel.But , personally, I believe that

music

connects two different

culture

Replace the word

cultural

show examples

generation

Fix the agreement mistake

generations

show examples

together.

Submitted by ashishgulia404 on Mon Oct 23 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

281 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Music is a good mean to gather people from different cultures together. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In the future, it seems more difficult to live on Earth. Some people think more money should be spent researching other planets, such as Mars. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Crime is a big problem in the world; many believe that nothing can be done to prevent it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion.

The best way to improve family life is to make fathers and mothers take courses regarding parents and child development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?