Some people believe that if a child commits a crime, he or she should be punished, while others think it is the child’s parent who should be punished. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is no doubt that crimes should be eradicated.
While
some people believe that the
child
should be punished for their
crime
, others believe that
parents
should be punished. In
this
essay, I will discuss both views and explain my support for the former view. The people who advocate that
parents
should be punished for
child
crime
argue that the children are influenced by
parents
and they have the responsibility for their
child
's activities. some
parents
are not
providing
Verb problem
paying
show examples
attention to their
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
show examples
and their behaviours.
For instance
, one of the recent studies indicates that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children are influenced by their
parents
, and domestic violence is the major reason for
child
crimes. A
child
who grows up in a better environment has less possibility of anti-social activities than a
child
who
grew
Wrong verb form
grows
show examples
up in a worse environment.
For example
, the kids from the
parents
who use drugs have more chances to use drugs from their experience.
However
, a
child
who committed a
crime
and punished their
parents
is not a sign of a good society. The punishment should be delivered with the intention of correction. If the
parents
are punished the kids will not correct.
For example
, The baby serial killer in India, who has killed more than two kids does not have any relation with his
parents
. Later the scientific panel discovered that it
child
had psychological instability. In conclusion, there are people who believe that the
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
are influenced by
parents
and their responsibility is to correct them.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
I believe that there is no relation between
child
crime
and
parents
. most of the
child
crimes are spontaneous.
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • commit a crime
  • be punished
  • hold someone accountable
  • deter
  • similar crimes
  • responsibility
  • consequences
  • shape behavior
  • guidance
  • supervision
  • nurturing environment
  • fulfill parenting duties
  • deterrent
  • motivate
  • accountable
  • criminal behavior
  • teach about responsibility
  • address shortcomings
  • parenting abilities
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