Advertising discourages people from being different individuals by making us all want to do the same and look the same. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #individuals #want

Nowadays,

this

is the information era, and

people

can see many advertisements in the mass media every day.

As a result

, some

people

think that we are becoming the same.

However

, I do not entirely agree with the view,

although

advertising influences

people

. For one thing, society is becoming more culturally diverse now, and every person has own different cultural insights. We can select more lifestyles.

Firstly

for example

, we watch many other mobile phone advertisements on TV so that

people

will buy the phone they like.

Finally

, advertising can help

people

to know more about different

products

. Indeed, we can use other

products

On the other hand

, the seller sells different

products

to make more profits, and the advertising shows additional details. For one thing, if

people

hope to show the difference when they face other

people

, at the same time, the seller must sell various

products

Otherwise

, their business will close. Another reason for

this

opinion is that the producer makes a different product to avoid competition so that they can get more benefits.

Nevertheless

, I must admit that advertising can infect many

people

and make them do the same thing, but the function is minimal

instead

of giving

people

different choices. In conclusion, individuals usually like different

products

and cultures, so advertising shows more differences in benefits. Even so, we have the same ways of consumption, but we are more distant from other

people

Submitted by erichardxin on Mon Oct 23 2023

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task response

Ensure that all the points raised in the prompt are addressed fully, and provide a clear opinion with supporting points.

coherence and cohesion

Work on organizing the essay into clear and logical paragraphs. Use cohesive devices to create a smoother, clearer flow of ideas.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and sophisticated words and phrases.

grammatical range

Develop more complex sentence structures and pay attention to subject-verb agreement and word order.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

237 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Advertising discourages people from being different individuals by making us all want to do the same and look the same. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

lnterviews form the basic selecting criteria for most large companies. However, some people think that interview is not a reliable method of choosing whom lo employ and there are other better methods. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Directors of large organizations earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do. Some people believe it is necessary, but others think that it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantage?

Some people think that online reading materials are better for children. Others argues that traditional paper based resources are better. Discuss and give your opinion

Some prefer hobbies that require technology while other people prefer hobbies that don't require technology. Discuss both views and give your opinion.