IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

#aim #science #people #lives
Some people think that
science
 should
became
Change the verb form
become
show examples
 a better place
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 people’s lives and
this
 has to be
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
 main aim. I
am totally agree
Change the verb form
totally agree
show examples
 with that opinion and from my perspective,
science
 one and only
tools
Fix the agreement mistake
tool
show examples
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 improve
person’s
Correct article usage
a person’s
show examples
life
 from
health
Correct article usage
a health
show examples
 to
time
Correct article usage
a time
show examples
 management perspective. Being healthy is one of the most crucial
aspect
Change to a plural noun
aspects
show examples
for sustain
Change preposition
of sustaining
show examples
 good
life
. Recent developments in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
genetics and medicine help humanity
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not only in unhealthy conditions but
also
 prevent
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
dieases
Correct your spelling
diseases
 and boost their health in daily
routine
Fix the agreement mistake
routines
show examples
. With
cutting edge
Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
show examples
 technologies in molecular biology, doctors can plan personal treatment with better
outcome
Fix the agreement mistake
outcomes
show examples
 in
short
Add an article
a short
show examples
time
.
Furthermore
, they have
ability
Change the article
the ability
show examples
 to check
person’s
Correct article usage
a person’s
show examples
 weaknesses
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
cell
Correct article usage
the cell
show examples
 level and boost their health.
For example
, lack of B12 vitamins cause different issues
such
 as stress, hard to memorise things and anxiety that
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
 people’s daily
life
 but doctors can easily help them with different pills. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, lots of work
done
Add a missing verb
is done
show examples
 by machines nowadays which saves people’s
time
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 spend
this
 space on themselves and improve
them
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
 in different fields. AI and robots do different tasks in companies from carrying heavy weights to
calculate
Wrong verb form
calculating
show examples
 profit and
prepare
Wrong verb form
preparing
show examples
 financial reports.
This
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 to lessen
working
Change preposition
in working
show examples
 times in a week from five days to three days. So, people have more leisure
time
 to gain different abilities which improve their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
,
such
 as
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
time
 on how to make
investment
Fix the agreement mistake
investments
show examples
 or gain knowledge about
second
Correct article usage
a second
show examples
 job to help them
for earning
Wrong verb form
earn
show examples
 more money. If universities didn’t focus on major
science
 objects
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 mechanics and mathematics,
this outcomes
Change the determiner
this outcome
these outcomes
show examples
 couldn’t
possible
Add a missing verb
be possible
show examples
 in that way. In conclusion,
science
 should only focus on
to touch
Change the verb form
touching
show examples
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
life
 not
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
time
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other things that can’t help society because technology is
only
Correct article usage
the only
show examples
tools
Fix the agreement mistake
tool
show examples
 that
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 us to live in good conditions.
Submitted by airbender on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
What to do next:
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