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Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a 'gap year'; before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others this is an expensive waste of time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #year #gap #work #university #chance #horizons #waste #time
Taking a
gap
year
 has been becoming more popular among
pupils
 in recent years.
While
 some people believe that a
gap
year
 may
positive
Add a missing verb
have positive
show examples
 effects on students, others argue it may not. I, personally, believe that
this
 decision should depend on
individual’s
Correct article usage
the individual’s
show examples
 personal life and aim, and I will explain
in
Correct pronoun usage
this in
show examples
this
 essay. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, many people believe
in
Change preposition
that
show examples
 taking a
gap
year
 may give huge amounts of benefits to
pupils
. They can travel around the world in their
gap
year
 which gives them a valuable chance to meet new people,
develop
Correct word choice
and develop
show examples
 their
communications
Fix the agreement mistake
communication
show examples
 or language skills. They can
also
 work in
gap
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 and
this
 provides a
job
 experiment
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them before
embark
Change the verb form
embarking
show examples
 on college
education
, which may put them one step ahead in the line of business
while
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 they
appliying
Correct your spelling
apply
 for a
job
 after their college
education
. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, taking a
gap
year
 may be costly for some
pupils
, those who
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
 not strong financial funds.
Additionally
, being far away from
education
 may result in a loss of academic momentum, and these students may have some troubles when they turn back the
education
.
Furthermore
,
pupils
 could lose some incentives, including bursaries or scholarships in their
gap
year
.
Finally
, I believe that the decision, whether
taking
Change the verb form
to take
show examples
 a
gap
year
 should depend on
individual's
Correct article usage
the individual's
show examples
 priorities. If their aim is
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
 in a
job
 market, a
gap
year
 would be effective to learn the
job
 in the kitchen.
Whereas
 for those who are willing to be part of
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
certain jobs
such
 as advocacy, medicine which require
well-rounded
Correct article usage
a well-rounded
show examples
education
, a
gap
year
 may disrupt their academic momentum. In conclusion, taking a
gap
year
 could be very effective and
benefitial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 or harmful and distracting for
pupils
according to
 their purpose. Their aim and financial status should have a key role
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
 decision.
Submitted by ilaydailday on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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