Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

#people #government #money #arts

Undoubtedly, a country's advancement depends entirely on where and how the capital budget is spent. In

this

epoch of technology, emphasising arts rather than

education

and well-being may not be a reliable approach to developing a nation.

Although

arts play a vital role in relieving stress and enhancing mental

health

, investing funds in other sectors

such

education

and

health

would be lucrative in the long term. The legal authorities should allocate funds to the sectors that could surge the financial situation

such

as schools, universities and hospitals. Healthy citizens are the cornerstone of a healthy economy. So, pumping money into healthcare centres will promote hygiene and disease-free life and, in turn, generate revenue.

For example

, Canada consumed one-third of their expenditure on the coronavirus vaccine to promote people's

health

so that they can go back to work without affecting others.

Besides

this

, learning is the fundamental right of everyone. Investment in higher

education

will give birth to an ingenious and skilled workforce.

For example

, an excellent precedent is established by the government of Japan, subsidised higher

education

to their people.

Hence

, the invention of high-tech companies

such

as Samsung and Nokia is the incredible result of

this

phenomenon.

Conversely

, the paramount importance of the arts and traditions cannot be overlooked. Spending on recreational activities assists individuals in releasing stress and anxiety.

Thus

, their mental

health

is promoted.

However

, spending solely on leisure activities is worthless because they are not a significant source of national income.

To conclude

, I firmly believe that the legislation should consume their expenditure on the departments that could assist them in earning rather than wasting the hard-earned dollars on innovative activities.

Therefore

health

and

education

should be prioritised

while

distributing national funds.

Submitted by sdeepkaur9 on Tue Oct 24 2023

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task response

Ensure that you fully address each aspect of the prompt, and provide a clear opinion on the topic.

coherence cohesion

Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay, with well-defined introduction and conclusion.

lexical resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to include more varied and precise expressions.

grammatical range

Work on using a wider range of complex grammatical structures and sentence types to demonstrate a more varied command of English.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

enriching society
promoting cultural understanding
development of talent
creative industries
economic benefits
generate revenue
cultural heritage
identity
prioritize spending
needs of the majority

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Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment. In your letter -describe the problem.

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arys and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disgree?

Some people believe that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that in the modern world, getting old is entirely bad. Others, however, say that life for the elderly nowadays is much better than it was in the past. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people assume that the goal of every country should be to produce more material and goods. To what extent do you agree or disagree that constantly increasing production is an appropriate goal.