immigration has become very useful these days what is your opinion about it

Nowadays, more and more children are facing overweight
problems
. Western countries are on the edge of
this
trend
and they are trying to find causes and solutions. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I am going to
hilight
Correct your spelling
highlight
some
reasins
Correct your spelling
reasons
and discuss possible ways to
brake
Correct your spelling
break
show examples
this
trend
. Overweight
problems
became
Wrong verb form
have become
show examples
more
popular
Correct word choice
common
show examples
in recent decades all over the world, and
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
society leads
this
trend
. There are several main reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
it,
such
as
:
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
junk
food
, the passive and unhealthy lifestyle,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
bodypositive
Correct your spelling
body positive
body-positive
trend
. The human mind likes high-calorie
food
, made from
shugar
Correct your spelling
sugar
and fat, because it used to consume as
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
calories as it can, but today
this
junk
food
became
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
too accessible, and, sometimes, cheaper than healthy
food
.
Otherwise
, children
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lack of active lifestyle and sports,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
spend more time sitting at the computer, because studies, entertainment and communications are
avalible
Correct your spelling
available
from home, with your PC or smartphone.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, the modern
thend
Correct your spelling
trend
then
bodypositive
Correct your spelling
body positive
body-positive
declares that everybody should
accapt
Correct your spelling
accept
yourself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
as
you
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
are.
This
thend
Correct your spelling
trend
then
has started
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
acceptance
Correct article usage
the acceptance
show examples
of disabled persons, but today it
spreads
Wrong verb form
has spread
show examples
to different topics. Overweight
problems
increase
risks
Correct article usage
the risks
show examples
of diseases and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern society
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to do something to decrease
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
of obese children.
Thends
Correct your spelling
Trends
in social media popularise
idea
Add an article
the idea
show examples
that weight
problems
are not connected to health and it destroys all motivation to do yourself better and to try to lose weight. To summarise –
this
trend
is a serious problem for
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
society, but it is
also
a new challenge for humanity.
This
problem became noticeable just one or two decades ago, and I believe humanity will find a solution to fix it.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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