In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Nowadays, the value of hard work has been promoted to
such
a high level, that in some countries,
children
are told that they can make any accomplishments through endeavour, which sparkles fierce debate. On the one hand,
this
information certainly has lots of positive impacts on youngsters.
To begin
with, it gives
kids
confidence in themselves and allows them to have big dreams, as they are convinced that whatever roles they
are aspired
Change to the active voice
aspire
have aspired
show examples
to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
, the pursuit can be fulfilled if they can keep on fighting for it.
In addition
to
this
, telling
kids
this
encourages them to tackle the problems when confronting difficulties
instead
of backing down. Knowing that they are capable of achieving their goals,
children
will not be afraid of the obstacles on the path and will try their best to stride over them, which is beneficial for their development of tough characters.
On the other hand
, the message can bring potential damage to juveniles as well. First of all, it can lead young
children
to the wrong path as they may pursue what is not suitable for them. Being over-confident in themselves and ignoring the significance of natural talent,
kids
can have unrealistic dreams and blindly chase them, thinking that they will eventually be realized, only to end up in huge failures. Worse still, youngsters may be misled into inappropriate and even illegal conduct. When finding out that they are impotent in achieving their goals fair and cleanly,
however
,
kids
sometimes can take extreme and even illegitimate measures in order to force the dream to come true, being under the influence of the ‘magic spell’. In
this
way not only will they lose their dream, but
also
they will even forfeit their whole life. In conclusion, telling
kids
that they can achieve anything if they put enough hard work into it can help build up
children
’s confidence and perseverance,
however
,
this
message can
also
bring
children
to undesired situations.
Submitted by 1762832590 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: