The bar chart shows how many people came from 5 countries to Australia for business, holidays or to visit family and friends in 2017.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart shows how many people came from 5 countries to Australia for business, holidays or to visit family and friends in 2017.

The chart illustrates the number of

visitors

Use synonyms

coming from 5 different nations to

Australia

Use synonyms

for the purposes of business, vacation or visiting family and friends in 2017.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be easily noticed that the largest number of

visitors

Use synonyms

came from China and New Zealand and most people came for a

holiday

Use synonyms

among

other

Correct article usage

the other

show examples

2 countries, the United States and Japan,

while

Linking Words

the British

visitors

Use synonyms

mainly came to see family and friends. First of all, over 650,000 Chinese and almost 500,000 New Zealanders came with the purpose of

holiday

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

Chinese

holiday

Use synonyms

visitors

Use synonyms

were considerably more than New

Zealanders’

Change noun form

Zealanders

show examples

visitors

Use synonyms

, both work and visiting purposes

visitors

Use synonyms

coming from New Zealand were slightly more than those coming from China.

Moreover

Linking Words

, there were similar trends among Japan and the USA

visitors

Use synonyms

for the reasons of travelling to

Australia

Use synonyms

. In both cases, the number of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

reasons why people came to

Australia

Use synonyms

were

Correct subject-verb agreement

was

show examples

the majority for a

holiday

Use synonyms

, followed by work,

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Interestingly, less than 500,000 Japanese travellers entered

Australia

Use synonyms

to visit other friends and relatives

while

Linking Words

over 300,000 Britishs came. The UK’s figures represented a different scenario.

sonyso

Oct 26, 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, australia, holiday with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

185 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

bar chart
visitors
business purposes
holidays
visit family and friends
comparison
analysis
trends
outliers
notable patterns
key insights
international visits
conclusion
summarizing

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The bar chart shows how many people came from 5 countries to Australia for business, holidays or to visit family and friends in 2017.

Countries around the world require more and more energy every year for domestic and industrial use. What are the causes of this excessive energy consumption, and how does it affect the environment?

A big salary is more important than job satisfaction? Do you agree or disagree?

The first man to walk on the moon claimed it was a step forward for mankind. However, it has made little difference in most people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?