IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people believe that we cannot learn anything from the past for our life today, while others believe that history is a valuable source of information to understand human’s life. Discuss both views and give your opinion – Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #life #history #source #information #human’s #answers
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the
contamporary
Correct your spelling
contemporary
 era, more and more people tend to ignore the different knowledge from the past, they think that it has no value to add to our present
time
. But some claim that history may
influencre
Correct your spelling
influence
 our lives
curcially
Correct your spelling
crucially
 and that we can learn a lot from the past, which can help us
improving
Change the form of the verb
improve
show examples
 our present. I think that the
last
 view is the correct one, I will elaborate on my perspective in the coming
paragraphes
Correct your spelling
paragraphs
. On the one hand, some may think that things coming from the
previoius
Correct your spelling
previous
time
 is old
fashion
Replace the word
fashioned
show examples
 and
thingd
Correct your spelling
things
 that were true in the past are not relevant to our daily life.
For instance
, in agriculture, there was
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
innoviation
Correct your spelling
innovation
 including
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
 machine that did not
exest
Correct your spelling
exist
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the past so we cannot learn a lot from the previous
time
 and the routes that were used
formely
Correct your spelling
formerly
 is not suitable nowadays.
On the other hand
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
knowoledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 from the past is essential and
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
 recent information
rely
Correct subject-verb agreement
relies
show examples
 on
this
 past
informatin
Correct your spelling
information
.
For example
, in
medecine
Correct your spelling
medicine
, new techniques developed upon the past one. In fact, we try to
innoviate
Correct your spelling
innovate
 the past methods and improve them so that they can be more relevant for the present
time
.
To conclude
,
I
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
 my opinion, the past is not less important than our recent
time
, we can learn a lot from the previous
time
 and
thus
 we can refine
these information
Change the determiner
this information
show examples
 and improve our life's quality.
Submitted by leenaasalee on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt and fully discusses both views.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your ideas logically and present a clear introduction and conclusion.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and vary your word choice.
grammatical range
Pay attention to your grammar and sentence structure to enhance clarity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • lessons
  • mistakes
  • insights
  • human behavior
  • cultural diversity
  • applicable
  • biased
  • distorted
  • present-focused
  • personal development
  • societal development
What to do next:
Look at other essays: