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Band 7

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computer-based technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to rely so much on computers?

#technology #change #future #computers
As computer-based technology is evolving, our
dependency
 on it is growing dramatically.
This
 essay will discuss possible changes in the future
as well as
 give my opinion, on whether
such
dependency
 is good for
people
. It is certain, that technological inventions will continue to appear and affect our computer consumption since more and more businesses are going to transfer their services online to provide customers with more efficiency. As the amount of possibilities provided through computers will
increase
, our
dependency
 on them will grow as well, because we will be able to solve more problems more easily.
Moreover
, COVID-19 changed our perception of working and studying
due to
 the fast development of online tools, since
then
 more and more
people
 have transferred to work remotely. All of these trends will grow and,
therefore
, our
dependency
 will continue to
increase
 in the future. But is
this
 human-computer
dependency
 good for the
people
? At first glance,
such
 advantages provided by technologies are quite attractive,
however
, in my opinion,
people
 should be aware of the drawbacks.
As a result
 of increased possibilities and tasks done online, the time spent there will continue to
increase
as well as
 our addiction.
Moreover
, what should
people
 do in situations where internet access is limited or broken, and they cannot complete the tasks
elsewhere
? Purely relying on computer-based technologies decreases human creativity
as well as
 important skills that could be only learned through real-life interactions and services.
To conclude
, in my opinion, as the technology and services provided by it will continue to
increase
,
as a result
, our
dependency
 will only get worse. In the future it will cause possible problems
such
 as addiction or safety issues,
therefore
, I do not think
such
 a relation to technology is good for
people
.
Submitted by katja.otavina on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one distinct idea related to the topic. Use topic sentences to introduce each new idea.
coherence cohesion
In the introduction, clearly state your opinion and provide a roadmap of the main points you will discuss in the essay.
task achievement
Support your main points with relevant examples and explanations. Make sure they directly relate to the topic and enhance your arguments.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more varied and precise words. Make sure your word choices are appropriate for the context.
grammatical range
Demonstrate a stronger command of grammar to improve clarity and coherence. Pay attention to sentence structure, verb tenses, and agreement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Artificial Intelligence (AI)
  • Machine Learning
  • Automated
  • Internet of Things (IoT)
  • Telecommuting
  • Digital Technology
  • Virtual Workplaces
  • Computer-assisted
  • Healthcare Industry
  • Reliance
  • Privacy
  • Human Interaction
  • Job Displacement
  • Automation
  • Digital Divide
  • Cybersecurity
  • Internet Safety
  • Digital Crime
  • Ethical Considerations
  • Environmental Impacts
  • E-waste
  • Carbon Footprint
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