IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

here have been some problems with the bus service, especially its reliability, in your area over the last two weeks. Write a letter to the manager of the bus company. In your letter • describe what the problems are • explain how these problems are affecting you • suggest what you would like the company to do

#bus #service #reliability #area #two #weeks #manager #company
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to
complaint
Replace the word
complain
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you
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to you
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 about the irregularity of your
bus
 service which is covering Park Avenue street, Berlin. I am Jennifer Loupz, a resident
in
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of
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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park avenue street
Correct your spelling
Park Avenue Street
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. I have been using your
bus
 service past two years, and It
was
Verb problem
has been
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 punctual except past two weeks. I would like to notify you that
the
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apply
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bus
 No. 257,
which
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apply
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has been late over the
last
 two
week
Fix the agreement mistake
weeks
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.
Moreover
, it
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 not
showed
Wrong verb form
shown
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last
 Friday. I am a student at Berlin University, and my class starts at exactly
at
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apply
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7am.
Due to
late
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the late
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 arrival of your
bus
in
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at
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 my station, I lost my three lectures over the
last
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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week. It. might affect my
acadamic
Correct your spelling
academic
 performance,
additionally
, It
also
causing
Wrong verb form
causes
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a
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apply
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mental pressure on me. I am requesting you to investigate the issue
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and take appropriate action to avoid the
inconsistancy
Correct your spelling
inconsistency
 of the
bus
 service. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Jennifer
Lopuz
Correct your spelling
Lopez
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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task response
Make sure to address all the points mentioned in the prompt. You did not provide suggestions for what the company should do to address the issues. Also, consider organizing your ideas in a more coherent manner.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your letter is clear and easy to follow. However, you could improve the overall coherence by using linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more effectively.
lexical resource
Your choice of vocabulary is generally appropriate and varied. To enhance your lexical resource, consider using more specific and descriptive words to express your ideas.
grammatical range
There are a few grammatical errors throughout the letter. Pay attention to verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and articles. Proofread your writing carefully to avoid such errors.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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