Some people think that the inteernet has brought people closer togethert while others that people and communities are bbecome more isolated. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

As a result
of an increase in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access to the
internet
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online communication become more popular. There are two opinions about
this
situation, some
people
consider it a good opportunity to keep in touch
witch
Correct your spelling
with
show examples
many
people
.
However
, another group see it as a cause of isolated communities. I am going to discuss both opinions and create my own. To become with, online devices give
people
a chance to meet and become friends with humans around the world. Electronic devices are small and portable enough to take it everywhere,
furthermore
Add a comma
furthermore,
show examples
the wifi become very common. Take my friend from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Italy as
a
Change the article
an
show examples
example, we both have access to the
Internet
for
majority
Add an article
the majority
show examples
of the our day,
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
a result, we talk every day. Without the
internet
, the amount of kilometres between us
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
will make
this
contact
enable
Correct your spelling
unable
show examples
to exist.
To conclude
, thanks to the technological development of the
internet
, friendships become easier to make and keep.
On the other hand
,
people
do not feel the urge to get to know humans from their closest community. It
quicker
Add a missing verb
is quicker
show examples
to find someone with similar hobbies and opinions on the
internet
, than
it
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
real life. As
a
Change the article
an
show examples
example, internauts
creates
Correct subject-verb agreement
create
show examples
many online groups. Everyone knows their interest in the group even before entering
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it. I think
this
leads to the situation when we know many
people
online, but
due to
effort
Correct article usage
the effort
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
needed we do not make relationships with
people
living close to us. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
conclusion, the
easinest
Correct your spelling
ease
of finding the connection with
people
online
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
makes real-life communities more isolated. To summarise, there are advantages and disadvantages of the
internet
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
when thinking about communication between
people
. In my opinion access to the
internet
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
people
the opportunity to make friendships with closer emotional connection.
While
it can be hard to arrange a personal meeting with
internet
friends, the ways of transport
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
developing all the time.
Due to
good transport,
long distance
Add a hyphen
long-distance
show examples
relationships will become easier and easier.
Submitted by a.swietochowska11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and provide a clear conclusion.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your main points.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to enhance the overall quality of your essay.
grammatical range
Work on improving your sentence structures and grammar usage for a more accurate expression of your ideas.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • facilitated
  • connection
  • geographical barriers
  • social media platforms
  • sense of belonging
  • diverse perspectives
  • collaborate
  • share knowledge
  • excessive use
  • social isolation
  • face-to-face interaction
  • addicted
  • disconnection
  • physical surroundings
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • withdraw
  • false sense of connection
  • superficial relationships
  • polarization
  • echo chambers
  • balance
  • benefits
  • drawbacks
  • foster
What to do next:
Look at other essays: