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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table shows the cost of water in 5 cities in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The table shows the cost of water in 5 cities in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.
#cost #water #cities #australia #summarise #information #features
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The table gives information about the
price
Use synonyms
 of water in 5 cities in Australia which are divided
in
Change the preposition
into
show examples
 2 categories
such
Linking Words
 as up to 125KL and over 125KL,
as well as
Linking Words
 the average bill
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 every house.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clearly seen that based on the average bill per house, the water in Perth is the most expensive,
while
Linking Words
 the cheapest water is in
Melbourne
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the fee for usage change per kiloliter starting from zero to up
125
Change preposition
to 125
show examples
 kiloliter
cost
Wrong verb form
costs
show examples
 the highest in Sydney, with 0.98
dollars
Use synonyms
 per kilo, followed by Brisbane with 0.81
dollars
Use synonyms
 per kilo, and in
Melbourne
Use synonyms
 with 0.78
dollars
Use synonyms
. Adelaide and Perth have the same
price
Use synonyms
 and are the cheapest among other cities, which is 0.42
dollars
Use synonyms
 per kilo.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the various prices for usage
more
Change preposition
of more
show examples
 than 125 per kiloliter
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
 applied. With 1.50
dollars
Use synonyms
 per
liter
Change the spelling
litre
show examples
, Perth holds the highest
price
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 category, followed by Adelaide with 1.00
dollars
Use synonyms
 per
liter
Change the spelling
litre
show examples
. Sydney, Brisbane, and
Melbourne
Use synonyms
 still maintain the low
price
Use synonyms
 below 1
Use synonyms
dollars
Change to a singular noun
dollar
show examples
, with 0.98
dollars
Use synonyms
 for
sydney
Change the capitalization
Sydney
show examples
, 0.84
dollars
Use synonyms
 for Brisbane, and 0.78
dollars
Use synonyms
 for
Melbourne
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by zefanyagyu on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words price, melbourne, dollars with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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