Some people think that students should learn a range of practical skills at school (such as car maintenance or managing money) alongside traditional subjects like maths and physics. Do you agree or disagree with this view?
It is said that
students
required
to learn additional Add a missing verb
are required
skills
that will be useful to them in life
, such
as car maintenance and money management, along with
traditional subjects currently studying in schools. This
essay will discuss about
the reasons why the changes in the Remove the preposition
apply
school
curriculum are extremely important and necessary for society.
Firstly
, in this
day and age, the school
curriculum includes a huge number of different subjects that cover the gigantic variety of science. An extensive study of all this
knowledge takes up a huge amount of time
in a teenager’s life
. For instance
, more than half of students
free time
is usually spent studying and completing tasks , which has a detrimental effect on the development of other skills
that will be more useful in life
. The study of practical skills
can make average students
Change noun form
students'
student's
life
easier. Moreover
, due to
the appearance of Change preposition
apply
a teenagers
with more free Correct the article-noun agreement
teenagers
a teenager
time
, it
lead to more enjoyable and happier lives for Correct pronoun usage
apply
young
generation.
Correct article usage
the young
Secondly
, in the long run
additional Add the comma(s)
run,
skills
lead to increasing productivity of population and economical
mobility. Replace the word
economic
For example
, in the case where people from school
time
start to gain experience in the
money management, Correct article usage
apply
time saving
and financial independence, they definitely Add a hyphen
time-saving
became
more efficient and successful in their work and Wrong verb form
become
life
. This
kind of change will improve the quality of life
for all people.
In conclusion, I absolutely agree with this
innovation in school
curriculum , Add an article
the school
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
Correct article usage
the economical
economical
Replace the word
economic
skills
for
Change preposition
of
students
. This
will bring great benefits for students
, who will built
our future and industrial progress.Change the verb form
build
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task response
Provide a clear and direct answer to the prompt at the beginning of your essay. This helps the reader understand your position.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a clear logical structure in your essay, with well-developed paragraphs that flow smoothly.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use more specific and precise language to convey your ideas.
grammatical range
Pay attention to your sentence structure and grammar, as there are some errors present.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?