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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

In many countries traditional food is being replaced by international fast food. Some claim that this has negative effects on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #food #effects #families #societies
In several nations, traditional cuisine is being overshadowed by the growing influence of international fast
food
.
While
 some argue that
this
 shift has detrimental effects on families and societies, I believe that it has both positive and negative consequences.
To begin
 with, the proliferation of international
fast
Add a hyphen
fast-food
show examples
food
 chains has indeed brought some adverse effects. These establishments often offer
food
that is
 high in calories, saturated fats, and sugars, contributing to health problems like obesity and related diseases.
Furthermore
, the convenience and affordability of fast
food
 can lead to a decline in home-cooked meals, potentially undermining family bonds and traditional culinary skills.
On the contrary
, the popularity of international fast
food
 has led to certain positive outcomes. These establishments create jobs and stimulate economic growth.
Additionally
, fast
food
 often adapts to local tastes, which can introduce new
flavors
Change the spelling
flavours
show examples
 and ingredients into a country's culinary landscape, thereby enriching the
food
 culture. It can
also
 foster a sense of belonging and connection as people embrace international cuisine, sometimes serving as a meeting point for different cultures. In conclusion, the prevalence of international fast
food
 has both negative and positive implications.
While
 it can pose health risks and alter traditional eating habits, it
also
 has the potential to create economic opportunities and enrich a nation's
food
 culture. The impact largely depends on how individuals and societies manage the balance between traditional and fast
food
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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task response
Your essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both the positive and negative effects of the shift from traditional food to international fast food. Well done.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a clear logical structure, with a well-constructed introduction and conclusion. The paragraphs are well-developed and connected with appropriate linking devices.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is generally appropriate and effective. However, try to incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary to enhance your essay.
grammatical range
Overall, your grammatical range is good, with mostly accurate and varied sentence structures. Remember to proofread your essay to eliminate minor errors.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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