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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph gives information about the number of Iranian, Greek and Turkish students who enrolled at Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009.

The line graph gives information about the number of Iranian, Greek and Turkish students who enrolled at Sheffield University between 2005 and 2009.
#line #information #iranian #greek #turkish #students #sheffield #university
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The
lines
Change the noun form
line
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graph presents information regarding
total
Change the article
a total
the total
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 number of
students
Use synonyms
 who enrolled at
Sheffield
Use synonyms
University
Use synonyms
 from 3
differences
Replace the word
different
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
Iranian, Greek and Turkish
during
Change preposition
from
show examples
 2005
till
Change preposition
to
show examples
2009. In general, there
always are
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 abroad enrolled at
Sheffield
Use synonyms
University
Use synonyms
 between 2005 and 2009 from
Iran
Use synonyms
,
Greece
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 and
Turkey
Use synonyms
.
Students
Use synonyms
 Abroad from
Iran
Use synonyms
 and
Turkey
Use synonyms
 consistently go up every single year.
Although
Linking Words
 always
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 enrolled at
Sheffield
Use synonyms
University
Use synonyms
, there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 any differences
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
Use synonyms
students
Correct quantifier usage
number of students
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 abroad from each country. The peak
student
Fix the agreement mistake
number of students
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 who enrolled at
Sheffield
Use synonyms
University
Use synonyms
 from both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Iran
Use synonyms
 and
Turkey
Use synonyms
 happened
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2009.
Total
Correct article usage
A total
show examples
160
Change preposition
of 160
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 from
Iran
Use synonyms
 and 120
students
Use synonyms
 from
Turkey
Use synonyms
 enrolled
for
Change preposition
at
show examples
Sheffield
Use synonyms
University
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at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 2009. The opposite of
Iran
Use synonyms
 and
Turkey
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
students
Correct article usage
the students
show examples
 from
Greece
Use synonyms
 always
go
Wrong verb form
went
show examples
 down every single year
start
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
at
Change preposition
from
show examples
 2005 until 2009. As
Correct article usage
a results
show examples
results
Fix the agreement mistake
result
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from
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 data,
peak
Correct article usage
the peak
show examples
 year of
students
Use synonyms
 abroad who enrolled at
Sheffield
Use synonyms
University
Use synonyms
 from
Greece
Use synonyms
 happened
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2005 and both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Iran
Use synonyms
 and
Greece
Use synonyms
occur
Wrong verb form
occurred
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2009.
Submitted by waauliya011 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 77%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, sheffield, university, iran, greece, turkey with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "differences" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go up" was used 2 times.
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