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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In many developing countries, there is a problem with declining quality of air and water from both industry and construction, causing high levels of water and air pollution. What measures could be taken to prevent this?

#countries #quality #air #water #industry #construction #levels #pollution #measures
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There is a decrease in the quality of
air
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 and
water
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as a result
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 of industrialisation and construction in several underdeveloped nations, which increases the level of
water
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 and
air
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 pollution.
However
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, a number of viable solutions can be developed to mitigate the above issue.
To begin
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 with, there are a multitude of approaches that can tackle
water
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 pollution.
Firstly
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, the ocean is getting contaminated to some extent
due to
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 the irresponsible method of disposing of waste into the sea.
Therefore
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, the governmental body should impose a heavy fine on any businesses in the industry that are unlikely to provide a waste treatment system.
Secondly
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, the over-exploitation of sea animals is
also
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 a contributing factor to the decline in the biodiversity of the ocean, which likely causes a scarcity of seafood in the near future.
Consequently
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, national leaders should introduce a reasonable quota to limit the amount of fish caught, and
thus
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 promote sustainable development in poor countries.
On the other hand
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, a range of measures can be taken to help the quality of
air
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 become better. The first remedy is that modes of public transport,
for
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example
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example,
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 buses and train systems, ought to be encouraged and constructed for the public.
This
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 can be done by increasing the price of gas, and
this
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 policy would prevent owners from using their private means of vehicles
as a result
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, which assists in reducing an enormous amount of carbon dioxide released into the atmosphere.
Moreover
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, citizens should be encouraged to use alternative sources of energy
such
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 as solar or tide power.
As a consequence
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, the mentioned idea can encourage sustainability in the long term.
To conclude
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, it is witnessed the decline in the quality of
air
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 and
water
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 caused by industry and construction, leads to different types of pollution.
Nonetheless
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, some actions can be taken to minimize the effects of the aforementioned issue.
Submitted by ledinhan168 on

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coherence cohesion
Provide a clear and strong thesis statement in the introduction to clearly address the prompt.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each supporting paragraph develops a single main point and is well-supported with specific examples.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and try to incorporate academic or formal language.
grammatical range
Continue to work on sentence structure and vary sentence types to demonstrate a wider grammatical range.
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