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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.

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Some groups of
people
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 argue that advertising plays a huge role in attracting customers to purchase certain
products
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 or services,
while
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 others suggest that advertising is no longer effective because
people
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 are already accustomed to it. In my opinion, advertising is still influential in influencing buyers' decisions to purchase. First of all, there are a variety of advertising strategies that can be implemented to promote
products
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 both through online and offline measures. Many
companies
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 and brands nowadays do not only rely on traditional means of advertising,
such
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 as advertisements on television or
magazines
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in magazines
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, but they
also
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 advertise their
products
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 by sponsoring competitions, placing their
products
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 in movie scenes, or even endorsing the so-called micro-celebrities.
For example
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,
RedBull
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Red Bull
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 holds many extreme sports competitions
while
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 at the same time supplying their energy drinks to the athletes and visitors.
Additionally
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, skincare
companies
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 pay
people
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 who are famous on social media to promote the
products
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.
On the other hand
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, all
companies
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 have now utilized advertising as the primary strategy to market their
products
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.
As a consequence
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,
this
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 has subconsciously trained
people
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 to identify advertisements around them.
People
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 no longer fall into the trap of marketing strategy to influence them to buy things because of the ubiquitous presence of advertisements.
For instance
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,
people
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 have gotten used to insurance
companies
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 that use overly dramatised short movies depicting the risks of not owning health or life insurance. In conclusion, advertising remains effective if it is presented in various forms that are not common to
people
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. In my opinion, advertising can still be a powerful tool to raise
people
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's interest in certain
products
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 because there have been efforts to innovate advertising methods.

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task response
Your essay provides a clear response to the task and addresses both views presented in the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is generally good, but some ideas could have been more effectively linked together.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is appropriate and demonstrates a good range of words and phrases related to the topic.
grammatical range
Your grammar is mostly accurate, but there are a few errors in sentence structure and verb tense.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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