IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Millions of dollars are spent on space research evey year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people believe that humans would invest millions of dollars in the solar systems,
instead
Linking Words
 of paying for standards of life on land. It is the opinion of
this
Linking Words
 writer that all of us ought to spend on standards of living on land to improve the ecosystem where we have been living and support more money for households in which are difficult conditions. it is vital to understand that prioritising spending huge payments on improving the environment on the land.
Due to
Linking Words
 the fact that the ecosystem is becoming worse day by day thanks to human activities and unawareness. There is a population explosion annually, manufacturing and consuming goods are rapidly rising ,
those
Correct word choice
and those
show examples
 step-by-step destroy atmospheres.
For instance
Linking Words
, a wider range of factories emit a huge amount of toxic exhaust
such
Linking Words
 as CO2, and SO2. These cause acid rain which worsens our architecture
as well as
Linking Words
 habitat and the ozone
also
Linking Words
 becomes worse .
As a consequence
Linking Words
, health problems are increasing because atmospheric quality is so low. From
this
Linking Words
 writer's experience, space research even contributes to polluting the Earth by the exhaust.
That is
Linking Words
 affecting people's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as the greenhouse effect, global warming, poverty and diseases.
Moreover
Linking Words
, if the exploration is successful, the poor can not afford the cost to live on it.
For example
Linking Words
, we are experiencing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global warming and the greenhouse effect,
that is
Linking Words
due to
Linking Words
 the emission of crafts used to study the universe.
Hence
Linking Words
, the writer is swayed by minimising crafts, as the latter rarely requires
such
Linking Words
 help. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I tend to believe that the authority should invest in sectors that will return to citizens,
such
Linking Words
 as education, health, and transportation.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To improve your score in task achievement, make sure to directly address the question and provide a clear opinion. It's important to cover all aspects of the prompt and offer a more balanced view if you are discussing a perspective other than your own. Avoid veering off-topic and ensure that all examples are directly relevant to the question at hand.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance your coherence and cohesion by organizing your essay with clear topic sentences for each paragraph that relate back to the main thesis. Make use of a variety of linking words to better connect ideas and paragraphs, ensuring a smooth logical flow throughout your writing. Avoid repetition and strive for a coherent progression of ideas.
Lexical Resource
Broaden your lexical resource by varying your word choice and avoiding repetitive language. Use synonyms effectively and demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. Be cautious with word selection to ensure precision and appropriateness in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
To improve your grammatical range and accuracy, practice using complex sentence structures and ensure correct tense use throughout. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, punctuation, and the use of articles. Proofread your work to minimize grammatical errors and refine your writing style.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancements
  • everyday life
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • resource management
  • scientific knowledge
  • future generations
  • educational growth
  • international collaboration
  • peace and unity
  • immediate issues
  • poverty
  • healthcare
  • urgent funding
What to do next:
Look at other essays: