IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do agree or disagree ?

#millions #dollars #space #research #year #people #money #standards #earth
There is an
arguement
Correct your spelling
argument
 that dollars should be spent on the
lving
Correct your spelling
living
 standards of the
Earth
whereas
 a
big
Correct word choice
large
show examples
 number of dollars are used to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
 on
space
 every year. The writer
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
 with the statement that
imrpving
Correct your spelling
improving
 the living of
Earth
 which is have more advantages. First of all, the
money
 nowadays
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 used to spend on lots of items to support
for
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apply
show examples
the
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
 outside the
Earth
. It may have to do something which
have
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has
show examples
a harmful effects
Correct the article-noun agreement
harmful effects
a harmful effect
show examples
 on the
Earth
.
Secondly
, because of many helps for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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space
due to
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human have to buy more material for experiments and emit
many
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apply
show examples
pollution which affect
to
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apply
show examples
the Ozone and the Oxygen of the
Earth
.
Furthermore
, the
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
 on
space
 are waste of time.
Therefore
, they have to use more
money
 to boost the time faster.
For example
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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chemical
material
Fix the agreement mistake
materials
show examples
such
 as Nitrogen
, Sulfur
Correct your spelling
and sulfur
 can be
use
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used
show examples
 to do research
of
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on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
 though
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 have a big impact on the Ozone and the gas
of
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apply
show examples
Sulfur can be
harm
Replace the word
harmful
show examples
for
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to
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human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
.
However
, there is a solution
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 issue. The scientists and governments should take the
money
 to spend on the living standard of
Earth
 more than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
. If we spend the
money
 on the facility of
Earth
 it can have so many positive benefits like improving the atmosphere for
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
, reducing the lack of Ozone,
developing
Correct word choice
and developing
show examples
 many methods to protect the environment.
Moreover
, it can have less danger of the work because if we are outside the
Earth
 we will have less
supportation
Correct your spelling
supposition
 than inside it and the
money
 to spend on it will be
saving
Wrong verb form
saved
show examples
. In conclusion, the writer strongly
argue
Change the verb form
argues
show examples
 that
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the living standard of
Earth
 will have many
advantages
Correct quantifier usage
more advantages
show examples
 than for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
 each year.

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task response
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction and address both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your ideas and arguments in a logical manner with clear topic sentences.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and avoid repetitive language.
grammatical range
Focus on improving sentence structure and grammar accuracy.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • space exploration
  • scientific discoveries
  • cutting-edge technology
  • pioneering research
  • socio-economic development
  • improved healthcare
  • education
  • poverty alleviation
  • infrastructure
  • balanced approach
  • cost-effective
  • prioritize
  • allocate
  • resources
  • budget
  • investment
  • sustainable development
What to do next:
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