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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Staying in full time education is necessary until they are 18-year-old. Agree/ disagree?

Owing to increasing competition and opportunities
among
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apply
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in different areas, it is societal pressure and a necessity to get compulsory
education
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.
Moreover
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, it is believed that
full
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full-time
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time
Use synonyms
education
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 has become essential for youngsters till the age of 18 years. I strongly agree that
full
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full-time
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time
Use synonyms
education
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 should be considered
as
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apply
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compulsory to ensure child success and growth.
Firstly
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,
Correct article usage
the full
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full
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full-time
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time
Use synonyms
education
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 of young students would provide a road map to
a
Correct article usage
apply
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get the desired career goal.
In other words
Linking Words
, it will help children to decide which
field
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 they would prefer to choose based on the knowledge gained from textbooks and learning from other’s practical exposure.
For instance
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,
A
Correct article usage
apply
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German Research indicates that 60% of the students pre-decided to do their intermediate in
commerce
Correct article usage
the commerce
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field
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 as they already preferred to enter
in
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apply
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the
field
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 of accountancy.
In addition
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 to
this
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,
Full
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Full-time
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time
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education
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 is
same
Correct article usage
the same
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 for every individual regardless of their desired profession.
Full
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Full-time
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time
Use synonyms
education
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 gives a basic idea and understanding of all the compulsory subjects like Maths, English, computer and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
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 necessary for an individual to learn in their life.
For example
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, A data scientist requires a good knowledge of all the physics and
computer related
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computer-related
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 concepts and formulas in order to better comprehend
in
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apply
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the
field
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. In conclusion,
Full
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Full-time
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time
Use synonyms
education
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 is immensely important for young people till the age of 18 years as it helps the students to decide about a clear career path and
also
Linking Words
basic
Add an article
the basic
a basic
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 understanding of all the compulsory subjects.

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your ideas.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and expressions to enhance your writing.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to ensure accuracy and clarity.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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