IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

#people #attention #experiences
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Advertising is an essential component of modern-day commerce. There have been competing views on whether advertising is highly effective at influencing our purchasing decisions or
it
Correct word choice
whether it
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 has become common and
people
Use synonyms
 easily ignore it. In my opinion, advertising is still extremely powerful and has
a
Change the article
the
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 power to
creates
Wrong verb form
create
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desire
Add an article
a desire
the desire
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 for
products
Correct article usage
the products
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 it is selling. Those who support the notion that advertising is not important anymore, believe that with the rise of digital media and ad-blocking software, consumers have greater control over the
commercial
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commercials
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 they see or do not see.
Also
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,
everyday
Replace the word
every day
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 various channels
such
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 as television, social media, billboards and emails
bombarding
Wrong verb form
bombard
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 us with different
kind
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kinds
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 of
advertisements
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.
This
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 huge volume of
advertisements
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 desensitized
people
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 to the content of publicity.
However
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, I do not think that facing with two
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
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advertisements
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 could have a highly dissuasive impact on
people
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 and huge
loss
Fix the agreement mistake
losses
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 for businesses. Those on the other side of the argument say that these days advertisers utilize various persuasive techniques to influence consumer behavior.
Also
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, companies invest significant resources in market research to understand their target audience and produce messages in line with their desire.
For example
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, they use influencer marketing on platforms like Instagram which has a great influence on a wide range of
people
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.
Additionally
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, advertising
try
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tries
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 to
revoke
Correct your spelling
evoke
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 a sense of need or urgency in consumers by using celebrity endorsement and emotional appeals. The effectiveness of these strategies is reflected in the profits generated by companies and huge
investment
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investments
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on
Change preposition
in
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 different
advertisements
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. In conclusion,
while
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 it is true that
people
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 have become adept at avoiding commercials, advertising remains a powerful force that can significantly influence
consumers
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consumers'
consumer's
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behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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, thanks to innovative advertising techniques, social media platforms and
find
Wrong verb form
finding
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 the target audience.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a specific idea or argument and that the ideas are logically connected.
task achievement
Include examples and evidence to support your points.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more specific and varied word choices.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and the use of complex grammar structures.
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