IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You are applying for a job and need a refernce.Write a letter to the boss in your former job. In your letter : Give details of the job Explain why it is important to you Suggest what information your ex boss could put in the reference.

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Dear Mr. Patrick, Good morning Patrick, I hope you are doing well. I intend to apply for a managerial role in the Front Desk department at Shangri-La Hotel located in Sydney, Australia. As I read the job description
from
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on
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 the company website,
this
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 position will require applicants to have at least 2 years of experience in front of the house.
Moreover
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, as a manager, I will be a leader of an enthusiastic, energetic team to work together to gain guest satisfaction and achieve financial goals at the same time.
Also
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, it will require the manager to provide training programs for new employees
as well as
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 continuously coach senior ones to achieve their full potential. As you always know my ambition and where I see myself in the next 5 years,
this
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 position is extremely important to me, which makes a new chapter of my life.
As a result
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, I would like you to be my referee in my updated resume because you know me so well. In reference, it will kindly request your basic details
such
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 as your full name, your current position, your contact number and your email address. I really appreciate that. Should you have any concerns, feel free to contact me by replying to
this
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 email or dialling my phone number. Kind Regards, John

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the letter. Consider organizing the information into separate paragraphs for each point.
coherence cohesion
Include a proper salutation and closing, addressing the recipient respectfully.
coherence cohesion
Focus on conveying your ideas clearly and concisely in each paragraph. Avoid introducing multiple ideas within a single paragraph.
task achievement
Provide more specific details about your accomplishments and responsibilities in your previous job to demonstrate your suitability for the new role.
lexical resource
Ensure the appropriate use of vocabulary and varied sentence structures to showcase your language proficiency.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to avoid any errors or awkward phrasing.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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