It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages?

Taking

Use synonyms

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

is somewhat important nowadays for

people

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both in

Change the word

their

show examples

the

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

professional and personal lives. It has positive and negative impacts as well in

people

Use synonyms

's lives.

However

Linking Words

, I opine that the disadvantages of

risk

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-taking

Change the verb form

are

show examples

more in one's

life

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than the advantages.

Firstly

Linking Words

, doing something with risks

cause

Correct subject-verb agreement

causes

show examples

an expected result most of the

time

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but there is a higher possibility

also

Linking Words

fail

Replace the word

failure

show examples

. Actually, the success rate is not 100% ever.

Besides

Linking Words

, the continuous

risk

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-taking is injurious to health.

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Risk takers

Correct your spelling

Risktakers

are worried most of the

time

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As a result

Linking Words

, they suffer

Change preposition

from

show examples

high blood pressure, sugar, coronary problems, cardiac problems etc.

In Addition

Linking Words

, If someone

take

Change the verb form

takes

show examples

a big

risk

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in a serious work there is a great chance that he will face a sharp decline and there will be no chance to come back as he took a

risk

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with all the

staffs

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staff

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he has.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, a calm

mind

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is always a Sharp

mind

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These kind

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This kind

These kinds

show examples

people

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obviously take risks but do not invest all they have in a single risky work. In work

life

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, thinking with a

quite

Correct your spelling

quiet

show examples

mind

Use synonyms

results.very good. In

personal

Correct pronoun usage

my personal

show examples

life

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Rephrase

apply

show examples

also

Linking Words

risk

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taking

cause

Correct subject-verb agreement

causes

show examples

relationship problems as most of the

time

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It drags all the sadness together.

Additionally

Linking Words

, a

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risk free

Add a hyphen

risk-free

show examples

man

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a chance to sustain more, live long and live

healty

Correct your spelling

healthy

Furthermore

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medical science and psychological

researches

Fix the agreement mistake

research

show examples

show that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

who can do all the

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

holding a calm

mind

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, their success rate is comperatively high than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

risk

Use synonyms

-taking

people

Use synonyms

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

all aspects of

life

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. At

last

Linking Words

, taking

Use synonyms

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

is important sometimes but not all the

time

Use synonyms

. working and handling all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

situations

Change preposition

with

show examples

a calm

mind

Use synonyms

is really important and a must for the expected outcomes.

Moreover

Linking Words

, professional and personal lives shouldn't be dragged into

risks

Fix the agreement mistake

risk

show examples

by the

people

Use synonyms

ashiqbillah99

Nov 1, 2023

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task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your ideas.

coherence cohesion

Organize your ideas in a more logical manner.

lexical resource

Expand your vocabulary and use more varied words and phrases.

grammatical range

Pay attention to your sentence structure and grammar.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

As the number of cars increases, more money has to be spent on road systems. Some people think the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that the user should pay for the cost. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Many people these days have a computer, laptop, telephone at their home for work. Do you think, working from home has more advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons.

There is a historical building in your town and the city council wants to pull it down, because there is no money for repairs. You are not happy with this decision. Write a letter to the city council and say Why is the building important? Suggest a solution to finance the repairs.