The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extent do you agree?
In today’s modern world, how to properly facilitate the well-rounded development of youngsters has always been raising lots of controversies. Many individuals believe that the greatest way to cope with
this
issue is to have more physical education
lessons and sports
activities in school. From my point of view, I totally agree with this
statement for the following reasons.
The first reason for this
is that the introduction of P.E. classes in the school curriculum will raise the activity level of the students
. They will have more time to play sports
and do exercise. Moreover
, this
assists students
in keeping away from the sedentary lifestyle. For instance
, students
spend a lot of their time sitting when they study, watch TV, and play video games. Particularly, the addition of physical education
lessons will allow them to do more exercise and keep off the passive lifestyle, which will accommodate a community whose younger members are less likely to face obesity, leading to numerous health risks such
as heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, stroke, and even cancer.
The second reason for this
statement is that the young generation will have a healthy lifestyle from an early age and maintain it until adulthood. From being forced to exercise at school, they will have the habit of exercising regularly, this
trend could reduce the number of obese people. Besides
, when children play sports
with their friends, they can relieve the pressure and increase various essential skills. In the eyes of a youngster, building, pretending, and running are all enjoyable activities, the playfulness of which is regarded to have the positive effects these enjoyable activities have on a child's overall
development in the social, cognitive, physical, and emotional domains by researchers and educational experts. As an example, playing sports
in teams like football and basketball will cultivate their communication and problem-solving skills.
In conclusion, I believe that the introduction of more physical education
has a copious benefit for students
, which is the best way for them to stay away from the overweight problem. We should always make a strong case for the value of physical education
in schooling programs in order to increase the amount of time kids spend working out.Submitted by jakelong16091994 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea supported by relevant examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Make certain that ideas flow logically from one paragraph to the next, using appropriate linking words and phrases to help guide the reader.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task thoroughly, ensuring that the opinion is clear and consistent throughout the essay. Make sure to address any possible counter-arguments to create a more well-rounded response.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to keep the essay interesting and engaging. Avoid overly simple sentences and try to demonstrate a range of grammatical structures.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
