IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Million of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the moeny should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree ?

#million #dollars #space #research #year #people #moeny #standards #earth
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Through out
Correct your spelling
Throughout
show examples
every
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 year,
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
Use synonyms
million
Correct your spelling
millions
show examples
 of
dollar
Fix the agreement mistake
dollars
show examples
 on discovering
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
instead
Linking Words
 of spending that amount of money on developing the Earth's living
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
. The author of
this
Linking Words
 essay would agree with the idea of improving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 daily lives because it would make no sense if humans do not have
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
 of living and they can not earn the
moeny
Correct your spelling
money
 to continue
making
Verb problem
doing
show examples
 space research. First of
al
Correct your spelling
all
show examples
,
Use synonyms
million
Correct your spelling
millions
show examples
 of
dollars
Use synonyms
spend
Change the form of the verb
spent
show examples
 on space research would help many residents in the
undeveloping
Correct your spelling
undeveloped
 nations. The
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
 of Africa's nations do not have the ability to afford for the local
people
Use synonyms
 one hundred percent of good living conditions. Those countries
own
Verb problem
are
show examples
 not up to standard facilities and have
big
Correct article usage
a big
show examples
 amount of
unemployments
Fix the agreement mistake
unemployment
show examples
 or
low-salaries
Correct your spelling
low salaries
show examples
 for
people
Use synonyms
 so that they can not afford
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
a better life.
Due to
Linking Words
 that,
Use synonyms
million
Correct your spelling
millions
show examples
 of
dollars
Use synonyms
 should
be spend
Change the verb form
be spent
show examples
 on improving the standard of living for
people
Use synonyms
 who still have to live and work in a bad living condition.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, those
Use synonyms
million
Correct your spelling
millions
show examples
 of
dollars
Use synonyms
coul
Correct your spelling
could
 help
improving
Wrong verb form
improve
show examples
 the healthcare of
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
. Several
pandamics
Correct your spelling
pandemics
pandemic
 passed by without the preparation of
people
Use synonyms
lead
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 to a lot of lives
were
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 taken.
However
Linking Words
, if we spend an amount of meny use on discovering spacecraft - which is the definition
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 still
argued
Wrong verb form
argue
show examples
 about
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
building more
qualitied
Correct your spelling
qualified
 hospitals on over the world to improve
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 healthcare. There are still so many
people
Use synonyms
can
Correct pronoun usage
who can
show examples
 not afford the
bil
Correct your spelling
bill
 of medicines
due to
Linking Words
 the reason of its limitation.
However
Linking Words
, if we spent more passion on researching
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
medicines for
people
Use synonyms
 and improving the
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
 in the hospital, we still save many lives who are urgently in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
need of help.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the money
spending
Replace the word
spent
show examples
 on discovering the spacecraft in recent years, in my view, we should take those
Use synonyms
million
Correct your spelling
millions
show examples
 of
dollars
Use synonyms
 to improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 living
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
as improving
Change preposition
improve
show examples
 the
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 in Africa or
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
healthcare. All of that would help to increase the standards of
human's
Change noun form
humans
show examples
 living on Earth.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that all parts of the essay prompt are addressed and provide a balanced argument with supporting ideas.
coherence cohesion
Use appropriate linking words and paragraph organization to improve the flow and logical structure of the essay.
lexical resource
Expand vocabulary by using a variety of synonyms, phrases, and idiomatic expressions.
grammatical range
Pay attention to grammar and sentence structure to ensure accuracy and clarity in communication.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: