Some people believe that team sports are very important for children to succeed in their career, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #team #sports #children #career

this

day and age, obtaining social skills is of utmost importance for one to succeed in life.

While

many people claim that the future success of kids results from joining collaborative

sports

, others show disapproval of

this

belief. To my mind, it is true that there are other essential activities that contribute to a person's achievement.

Firstly

, it is worth considering that teamwork is a prerequisite in today's workplace. Employers always value members who can cooperate well with other coworkers in order to complete a project well.

That is

why companies frequently organise team-building holidays so as to tighten the relationship between employees and

also

increase their sense of community. For kids, playing group

sports

is an excellent way to promote

this

skill.

For instance

, a goal can only be scored through a combination of all eleven members' efforts rather than that of an individual.

Thus

, being in a team can empower children with

this

crucial ability to help them perform better at work.

Secondly

, it is

also

noticeable that critical thinking, self-reflection and independence are among various other essential requirements for one to achieve great success.

In other words

, a young person must have self-consciousness to realise his strengths and weaknesses in order to improve himself constantly.

Additionally

, an active citizen of the future has to be flexible at problem-solving independently. Suppose that a student does not receive peer assessment in time to adjust his essay. In

this

case, he is expected to trigger his intrinsic motivation and self-regulate his learning skills to find a proper solution. From

this

example, it can be seen that playing team

sports

is a socially crucial practice for growing soft skills but independent working and self-reflection are

also

what matter.

To sum up

, youngsters can adapt to

this

constantly changing world thanks to familiarising collaborative jobs when doing outdoor activities.

However

, climbing a ladder of success requires other abilities

such

as problem-solving, confidence, and self-reflection as well.Some people believe that team

sports

are very important for children to succeed in their careers,

while

others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Submitted by phamngoclannhu.97 on Wed Nov 01 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction paragraph. This will help the reader understand your position from the beginning.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is generally effective. However, consider including a stronger topic sentence for each paragraph to clearly introduce the main idea.

lexical resource

Your essay demonstrates a strong lexical resource. Continue to use a variety of vocabulary to enhance the language used in your essay.

grammatical range

Your grammatical range and accuracy are fairly strong. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency throughout your essay.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

350 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
It is believed that melody is a suitable method for connecting communities of different cultures. In this essay, I discuss the reasons for this belief, and then I express my opinion. To start with, the cultural identity of an association is known by its opera. Each country owns its specific piece style. For example, African folk are known for their local rap. They use their specific musical instruments including flute and drum. Some countries use string instruments such as guitars and violins. The background of their culture is represented by their rock. Therefore, different countries show their culture through their traditional singing. As the soul affects the thoughts and feelings of humankind, it provides a thinking route for civilization. Accordingly, listening to the music of nations is a way of getting familiar with the literature and culture of that humanity. Secondly, the beliefs and values of a public are shared among the public of that community who listen to them. For e...
5.5
band
Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. Some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. Discuss both these views and give your opinion
It is undeniably true that some minority languages may disappear in the near future. Although some people suggested that preserving these languages is merely a waste of money, I believe that there are
6
band
In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays people store knowledge on the internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In today’s modern society, there are certain individuals who absorb information on the internet. Although storing information online has some drawbacks, I am firmly convinced that the benefits are more significant.
5
band
You eat at your college cafeteria every lunchtime. However, you think it needs some improvements. Write a letter to the college magazine. In your letter, Explain what you like about the cafeteria Say what is wrong with it Suggest how it could be improved
I am writing this to inform you, I am sitting in the college canteen for lunch on a daily basis with my friends. I notice the college cafeteria should be updated more.
8.5
band
The charts below show the percentage of the energy generate from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The two pie charts illustrate, the proportion of generation of power from six different types of natural sources of energy in a state between 1985 and 2003.

Some people believe that team sports are very important for children to succeed in their career, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. Some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays people store knowledge on the internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

You eat at your college cafeteria every lunchtime. However, you think it needs some improvements. Write a letter to the college magazine. In your letter, Explain what you like about the cafeteria Say what is wrong with it Suggest how it could be improved

The charts below show the percentage of the energy generate from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.