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Band 5.5

Some think dangerous extreme sports such as skydiving and rock climbing should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#think #sports #rock
A set of individuals believe that
the
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apply
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life-threatening, intense
sports
such
 as skydiving and rock climbing should be prohibited from being enjoyed by
people
. From my viewpoint, I disagree with
this
 notion as adventure lovers are thrilled by engaging in these types of
sports
 and they
also
 encourage them to maintain physical stamina.
Firstly
,
the
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apply
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adventure seekers all around the world are developing an endless yearning to accept
challenges
Correct article usage
the challenges
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 of enjoying risky
sports
 by actively participating in them.
This
 has led them to follow their passion
while
 considering it as a self-motivation for them.
Moreover
,
continuous
Change the word
continuously
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 taking part in these fitness activities
help
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helps
show examples
 them to realize a sense of accomplishment for them.
For instance
, in the UK, Bunjee jumping and parachuting
had
Wrong verb form
have
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 been considered as few of the most demanded and enjoyed
sports
 in the amusement parks in
the
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apply
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recent years.
Secondly
, the sportspersons who participate in these dangerous
sports
 are always encouraged to maintain
a
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apply
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better physical stamina throughout their life as
the
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body balance, muscle endurance and physical activeness have an immense impact on it.
Furthermore
, mental stability is
also
 equally imperative as determination and perseverance act as essential traits that should be well developed when doing these
sports
.
For example
, nowadays artificial intelligence has developed therapeutic treatments for phobias related to great heights suffered by patients.
This
 is to create the mental readiness of
people
 for risky and challenging
sports
. In conclusion,
although
 some
people
 think that
sports
 that arouse
adrenalin
Correct article usage
an adrenalin
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 rush should be forbidden by the government, I am
with
Change preposition
of
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 the opinion that they shouldn’t be banned as these recreational activities are better stimulators for adventure thrillers and
the
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apply
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people
 who are concerned
of
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about
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 maintaining a proper balance of physical and mental well-being.
Submitted by tnirmani94 on

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coherence cohesion
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