New household appliances have resulted in more free time for women and has enabled them to both work and run a home with dependent children. What are the advantages for a family when the mother works? Do you think advantage outweigh diadvantages?

In the present situation, various appliances are available in the market to complete most of the daily household activities and it results in more leisure time for
women
.
Hence
, few of them continue their job and parallelly take care of their children.
This
essay explains the potential advantages of working
women
along with
my opinion on
this
.
Firstly
, the prominent pro will be financial stabilisation. In
this
current expensive world, it will be difficult to run a family with a single person's income so, both wife and husband should work to bear financial expenses.
Moreover
, working
women
get more respect in family and society compared to housewives.
Secondly
,
women
will get the opportunity to gain knowledge about society and suggest to their family the right path in both education and career.
Nevertheless
, with their busy schedule, they may not spend more time with family and it may lead to a combat connection between parent and child. In spite of the very few reasons, I think there are more advantages to female working in society.
For example
, my aunt is a software engineer and he is running her children
along with
office work. Now, they are living in their own house with a new Tesla car and she is the most respectful person in my relatives' family group.
To sum up
, there should not be gender inequality in the concept of raising children
instead
both parents should take equal responsibility to run the family.
This
could lead to a happy and healthy world.
Submitted by ssssss9999 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a specific idea and is connected logically to the overall essay.
coherence cohesion
Provide a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize the main points.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more specific examples and evidence.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to improve the richness of your essay.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: