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Writing Samples /
Band 5

millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. some peope argue that the money should spent on improving living standards on earth. do you agree or disagree

#millions #dollars #space #research #year #peope #money #standards #earth
many
people
 believe that
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 huge amount of
money
 should be spent on
space
research
everyyear
Correct your spelling
every year
.
whereas
 others think that it is more
nescessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
thes
Correct your spelling
this
money
 on improving
iving
Correct your spelling
living
 standards on earth. it is the the opinion of
this
 writer that
money
 should be spent on improving living standards on
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
show examples
 rather than on
space
research
. it is vital to understand that once
space
research
gain
Change the verb form
gains
show examples
 any result it will be a very big achievement for many
scientist
Change to a plural noun
scientists
show examples
.
due to
 the fact that
space
 is still a big mystery for
people
 as we have not
explore
Change the verb form
explored
show examples
 much of it
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
as a
consequence
Add a comma
consequence,
show examples
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
 the
research
 success
people
 will
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 more
money
 on it
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 hope that they can find more
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
 in
space
 or even if they do not success they will still
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 more
money
 for a hope that
they
Add a verb
they are
they were
show examples
cn
Correct your spelling
can
 find something out there on
space
. both will
lend
Correct your spelling
lead
show examples
 to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 result that
this
 country will become poorer because the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 has
increase
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 the tax,
this
 will make the living standard even decrease.
therefore
, a plan to use
money
Add an article
the money
show examples
on improving
Change preposition
to improve
show examples
 living
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
 will lead to
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
. another key component of the case for
spent
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
money
 on improving living standards is that if the living standard increased the living conditions will
increase
 and the
people
's
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
 will
increase
,
this
 will make
this
 country become richer and
then
 there will be more
money
 to spent on
space
research
 with worry about the living condition.
thus
, it can be seen that the decision to spend
money
 on improving the living standard or
space
research
 are
valid
Add an article
a valid
the valid
show examples
argument
Fix the agreement mistake
arguments
show examples
 for
people
 to consider,
therefore
 it should be demonstrated that
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 living
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
 are
nescessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 for many countries.

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task response
Make sure to address all aspects of the task prompt and clearly state your position.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a logical manner and ensure a clear introduction and conclusion.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and synonyms to enhance your writing.
grammatical range
Work on sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and accuracy.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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