IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

You recently applied for two separate jobs. Both have chosen to hire you, but you must write a letter to one of them explaining why you are unable to take the position. Include in your letter: – An apology – An explanation of your situation

#two #jobs #position #apology #explanation #situation
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
you
Change preposition
to you
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 to apologise for
unable
Add a missing verb
being unable
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 to accept your job offer. I am Jennifer Ramos, I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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applied for the accountant position in your establishment
on
Change preposition
apply
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last
 month and I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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received an offer letter from your company on October 30, 2023. I
regreat
Correct your spelling
regret
 to inform you that I could not able to accept your offer
due to
 the confirmation of
an
Remove the article
apply
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another job. As I did not
received
Change the verb form
receive
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 any reply from your organisation after a month, I assumed that my application was rejected.I saw an advertisement on
Suday
Correct your spelling
Sunday
tabuloid
Correct your spelling
tabloid
 for a teacher vacancy
on
Change preposition
at
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 ABC school. I am passionate about
teaching
Add an article
the teaching
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 profession, so I applied for the position
also
. They called me for an interview
last
 week and selected me for the job.
Furthermore
, I have started my orientation training on October 31, 2023. I would like to
recommed
Correct your spelling
recommend
 my friend Mr. Josaph Mani for
this
 position, he is a university rank holder and fond of
accounting
Add an article
the accounting
show examples
 profession. I have attached his CV with
this
 letter for your kind consideration. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Jennifer Ramos
Submitted by ck.manshad on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and organized logical structure throughout the letter by providing a smooth flow of ideas and avoiding repetition.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate and polite. Well done.
coherence cohesion
Try to focus on a single idea per paragraph to enhance clarity and coherence.
task achievement
The response addresses all the required elements of the task, but could be more concise and direct in explaining the situation.
task achievement
The writing tone is suitable for the purpose of the letter.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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