Fast-food companies should not be allowed to give away free toys with their food. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#fast-food #companies #toys #food

Undoubtedly ,fast

food

organisations earn a hefty amount of wealth by advertising the

freebies

with their meals ,and the

food

is consumed by

children

with joy after gaining toys

however

, the drastic effects caused by consumption of

ready to eat

Add a hyphen

ready-to-eat

show examples

food

are shunned by buyers. I am completely in favour of

aforementioned

Add an article

the aforementioned

show examples

statement.

As per

Change preposition

From

show examples

my standpoint,

this

practice should be disallowed with immediate effect. To commence with reasons to support my opinion, the proclaiming promotions of companies lure

children

by offering

freebies

with

food

items, and

children

are

exhilrated

Correct your spelling

exhilarated

such

advertisements which leads them to buy unhealthy

food

In addition

temptation

Add an article

the temptation

show examples

of free toys gives

invitation

Add an article

an invitation

the invitation

show examples

to unwanted expenses.

In other words

, kids expend money on unwanted edibles in order to receive toys.

For instance

Mcdonals

Correct your spelling

McDonald

' is a prominent

food

chain company that renders a free figure of their mascot ' Ronald' with their meals.

As a consequence

, consumers are attracted by giving away

freebies

of their action figures in order to raise sales of

food

outlets. Probing ahead, the high content of calories present in

fast-

Correct your spelling

fast-food

show examples

food

items cause various ailments like high blood pressure, obesity, heart problems etcetera.

Thus

, indulgence in

food

served by

fast-

Correct your spelling

fast-food

show examples

food

outlets has drastic effects on

human

Add an article

the human

show examples

body and

major

Add an article

the major

a major

show examples

issue is obesity which is

further

linked to heart problems. To exemplify, in developed nations, residents mostly or solely thrive on fast

food

,and it is manifested in the fact that these nations make up for the largest chunk of obese people.

As a result

, residents suffer from serious ailments. To recapitulate, owing to

aforementioned

Correct article usage

the aforementioned

show examples

reasons it can be concluded that these advertisements should not be continued and

authories

Correct your spelling

authorities

authorises

should take serious action

toward

Change preposition

against

show examples

the companies that lure

children

using

freebies

Submitted by gill.g24 on Thu Nov 02 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph discusses a single idea and is properly connected to the preceding and succeeding paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Include a clearer and more precise thesis statement in the introduction.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the overall lexical resource.

grammatical range

Pay attention to subject-verb agreement to improve grammatical range.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

289 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some believe that modern technology is increasing the gap between rich and poor people, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
It is sometimes argued that advances in technology have led to an increase in the space between the affluent and the less privileged, while others believe it is the opposite. Although, new machines have closed the distance between wealthy people and the poor because of social media, however, I believe the development in the gap between these people is because modern automation is expensive to purchase.
5
band
Task 2 Nowadays, instead of locally sourced produce, many supermarkets sell a variety of foods imported from countries all across the world. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In comtempory societies, there has been an uprising trend of selling imported food rather than local porducts in many supermarkets worth considering. This writer strongly assumes that the drawbacks of the increase in the cost of living and the growth of unemployment outweigh the benefit of the quality of food.
6
band
you have seen an advertisement from a couple, who live in Australia, for someone to teach their two children your language for a year. Write a letter to the couple. In your letter: * explain why you think you would be suitable for the job * say what else you could do for the family * give your reasons for wanting the job
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Thompson
4.5
band
in some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness traniner, rather than playing sports or doing exercis classess is this positive and negative of hiring private trainer
Private trainers are in higher demand in several countries. Conducting the trainers has benefit in performing sports or physical exercise as they likely can scan through a diet habit and the abilities of individal that can perform during the session. I believe that there would be a positive impact in getting the private trainer instead of doing in the class activities.
5
band
Students who are given grades work harder than those who do not. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
In this cutting -edge era, learning is an important tool in everyone's life.which may decide our future.Although, Children who get highest grades working hardly more than the person who is do not achieve high score.I strongly agree with this notion.This essay will articulate predominant reasons for agreement in forthcoming paragraphs, along with a relevant conclusion.

Fast-food companies should not be allowed to give away free toys with their food. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some believe that modern technology is increasing the gap between rich and poor people, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Task 2 Nowadays, instead of locally sourced produce, many supermarkets sell a variety of foods imported from countries all across the world. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

in some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness traniner, rather than playing sports or doing exercis classess is this positive and negative of hiring private trainer

Students who are given grades work harder than those who do not. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.