Should the government support artists, such as musicians, writers, and painters? Is it economically beneficial or is it just waste of money? Why or why not?
Some individuals contend the notion that encouraging authority to several celebrities,
such
as musicians, authors, and painters would be beneficial to increasing the economy of some regions. I argue the standpoint that it will be detrimental to the government economically. This
essay will discuss several reasons why the government should not backing well-known society.
Famous individuals are financially stable. To begin
with, artists with numerous talents could earn an amount of money by showing their talents. They could earn wage
easily rather than Fix the agreement mistake
wages
public
in general. One example is an artist who has the ability as an author and has numerous books that are already known by the public around the world, they might have Correct article usage
the public
completely
huge opportunity to earn more payment by selling their books. Add an article
a completely
Moreover
, if they were not as famous as celebrities but had the capacity as a writer, they still could make more money rather
than other Rephrase
apply
community
who do not have the ability to. Fix the agreement mistake
communities
Therefore
, the authority does not need to spend fund
on them.
Another thing is that celebrities could be famous for their own creation. First of all, artists’ work could attract Fix the agreement mistake
funds
public’public’
attention by doing anything that they could do. By doing Correct your spelling
public public
this
, people around the world would likely pay attention to them and be more likely to backing
them. Change the form of the verb
back
Furthermore
, the support of the public might be supplying them with some check
. Fix the agreement mistake
checks
For instance
, if they do live on TikTok and attract several followers to watch their video, then
their followers could give them wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
while
they are live on the app.
In conclusion, there are two reasons why the government should not backing
Wrong verb form
back
well-known
public. Correct article usage
the well-known
First,
they are already financially stable and the second one is they could easily attract people’s attention to earn more salary.Submitted by musa.nuwa on
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task response
You have provided a partial response to the task. While you argue that government support for artists would be detrimental to the economy, you have not fully developed this argument or addressed the potential benefits that proponents of government support may argue. Consider presenting a more balanced argument and providing evidence and analysis to support your claims.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is generally clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, your arguments lack coherence and cohesion. Make sure to use appropriate linking words and phrases to connect your ideas and improve the flow of your essay.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is satisfactory, but lacks variety and sophistication. Try to incorporate more diverse and precise vocabulary to enhance your essay's lexical resource.
grammatical range
Your grammatical range is limited, with several errors in sentence structure and verb tense. Pay closer attention to your grammar and revise your sentences for clarity and accuracy.
Your opinion
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