IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

All students should be required to study art and music in secondary school.Use specific reasons to support your answers.

Modern life appears with its blessings and curses.There are always hot issues that demand personal opinion and individual approach .One of those issues concerns
students
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' study of
music
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 and
art
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 in secondary school.There are always three opposite parts of opinions two polar opposites and a neutral one.As a person, I partially agree that
students
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 are among the supporters of
music
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 and
art
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. And
this
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 position should be discussed and proved in the coming lines of the essay . First and foremost thing that opponents say that
art
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 and
music
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 are not very important.
On the other hand
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, it is
also
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 possible that it helps to use the inner feelings in
students
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.
For
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example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 when
students
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 start studying
art
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 and
music
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 they might discover inner traits and talents ,
hence
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 develop them and stick to them as a hobby or as a source of inspiration .There are
also
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 some significant factors pertaining to the future results of the changing lifestyle of
students
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. As for
music
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 and
art
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, the subjects can help to engage
students
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 in studying. Meanwhile, many
students
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 find it challenging and boring to focus on education
such
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 subjects as
art
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 and
music
Use synonyms
 can assist them by making learning more entertaining and captivating.
For instance
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, if
students
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 feel severe stress and fatigue they will help them to distract
music
Use synonyms
 and
art
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. To summarize all of the given information and opinions it is likely to be concluded that
art
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 and
music
Use synonyms
 subjects are not as valuable as math chemistry or history.

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task response
Provide a clear thesis statement at the beginning of the essay to clearly state your position on the topic.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a logical and coherent manner. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a clear main point and supports it with relevant examples.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and varied language to express your ideas.
grammatical range
Work on sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors and improve the overall clarity and coherence of your writing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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