Everyone of us should become a vegetarian because eating meat can cause serious health problems. To what extent do yo agree or disagree?

Healthy eating habit is one of the famous

slogan

Fix the agreement mistake

slogans

show examples

introduced in the past and is still being promoted nowadays. As communities continue to be more fastidious about wellness, more and more

health conscious

Add a hyphen

health-conscious

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individuals feel that giving up

meat

can elevate one's

health

. In

this

essay, I do not agree that everybody must become a vegetarian as adding

meat

Change preposition

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our diet can result in serious

health

problems.

Firstly

, the holistic healthy diet of human beings includes both vegetables and

meat

as these complete the food pyramid that

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

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vitamins, minerals, and

protiens

Correct your spelling

proteins

For example

, a meal

comprises

Wrong verb form

comprised

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of a salad and roast beef can provide vitamins

along with

protein and iron.

This

is a healthy

balance

Correct your spelling

balanced

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diet that may support people's wellness. It means that different types of food can provide different types of minerals needed for individuals to maintain their

health

Moreover

, vegetables can be detrimental to our body if they are not prepared properly and

this

also

similar in the case of pork, beef, and poultry products.

This

statement

refers

Verb problem

means

show examples

that any food can be unhealthy if it is not prepared and consumed responsibly.

For example

, if people eat contaminated

meat

they can suffer from severe stomach pain,

nausea

Correct word choice

and nausea

show examples

, and may even lead to death if not treated properly. In conclusion, being vegetarian is not an assurance to become healthy and so with eating

meat

Submitted by melcastillo15 on Fri Nov 03 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that all paragraphs are logically organized and follow a clear structure. Provide more explicit topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.

coherence cohesion

Include a more comprehensive introduction and conclusion that clearly address the prompt and summarize your main points.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay. Consider using synonyms and more sophisticated vocabulary to express your ideas.

grammatical range

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. Ensure that your sentences are complete and correctly punctuated.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

229 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Everyone of us should become a vegetarian because eating meat can cause serious health problems. To what extent do yo agree or disagree?

Your opinion

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, the umber of animals and plants is decreasing. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in highschools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some parents say that children should play individually more than in a group. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and include your own opinion.