IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

the graph below showa the unemployement rates in the us and japan between march 1993 and march 1999.

#showa #unemployement #rates #japan #march
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Given is a graph indicating some information regarding jobless propitiation in the US and
Japan
Use synonyms
 over a
period
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 of six years.The unemployment
rates
Fix the agreement mistake
rate
show examples
 is measured in percentage of work force (
POWF
Use synonyms
).
Overall
Linking Words
,over the surveyed
period
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, The number of US witnessed a drop during the given
period
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.
Japan
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 experienced an increase during the given
period
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. Increasing from 3.5 (
POWF
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) in
March
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 95 to 5.6 (
POWF
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) in
March
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 98 the rate of
Japan
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 witnessed an
increased
Change the form of the verb
increase
show examples
 of 2.1 (
POWF
Use synonyms
) until 1999. US rate decreased from 6 to 5 between
March
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 95 and
March
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 96. In
general
Add a comma
general,
show examples
 the figure for
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 fluctuated widely but the general trend was downwards reaching from 7 (
POWF
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) to 5 (
POWF
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). The figure for
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 and
Japan
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 remained fairly stable at around 5 (
POWF
Use synonyms
)
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
March
Use synonyms
 98 until
March
Use synonyms
 99.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction includes the necessary information about the graph, such as the title and dates. Also, provide a conclusion summarizing the main points.
task achievement
Support your main points with specific examples, such as the actual figures for unemployment rates instead of the percentage change.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary by using a wider range of words and phrases.
grammatical range
Pay more attention to your sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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