It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages ?
People
take Use synonyms
risks
in different topics Use synonyms
such
as Linking Words
proffessional
and private lives and Correct your spelling
professional
this
is important for their Linking Words
livesfe
. I think taking Correct your spelling
lives
risks
can open different chapters in Use synonyms
people
’s lives Use synonyms
andlivesfe
and it has far more advantages than living in stable conditions.
High Correct word choice
apply
risks
bring high revenue and most of the time Use synonyms
people
even can not imagine what Use synonyms
life
will bring after Use synonyms
takinge
Correct your spelling
taking
risks
. Use synonyms
For instance
, they can go abroad Linking Words
tofor
a construct new Correct your spelling
to
life
or quit their job to launch a new business. In both ways, Use synonyms
indiuviduals
can earn more money, learn important skills, and gain financial freedom. Without taking Correct your spelling
individuals
risks
, achieving those benefits can take a long time but after getting older, Use synonyms
people
will face Use synonyms
with
serious health problems Change preposition
apply
instead
of spending that money Linking Words
tofor
live a good Correct your spelling
to
life
. Use synonyms
Also
from their personal perspective, Linking Words
people
only Use synonyms
becomea
Correct your spelling
become
a
mature after Correct article usage
apply
facinge
Correct your spelling
facing
with
hard conditions and risky environments create those environments to improve Change preposition
apply
people
’s self-journey.
Use synonyms
However
, taking Linking Words
risks
can be quite challenging. Use synonyms
People
will push their boundaries and they will have a hard Use synonyms
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
that
Correct word choice
which
aeffect
Correct your spelling
affects
people
’s mental Use synonyms
healths
Fix the agreement mistake
health
such
as living with anxiety and stress. But, these problems can easily be solved with regular exercise or meditation. Linking Words
In addition
to that, if a person is responsible for looking after their children and earning money for them, it can add more pressure and Linking Words
aeffect
their personal relations with family members, but when they have good communication with family members, they can easily manage the situation.
In conclusion, from my perspective, it is the only way to move forward in Correct your spelling
affect
effect
affects
life
possible Use synonyms
towith
Correct your spelling
with
takeing
high Correct your spelling
taking
risks
and it brings lots of benefits. Use synonyms
Moreover
, issues that come with Linking Words
risks
can easily be solved with different approaches.Use synonyms
Submitted by airbender on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Response
Your essay addresses the topic of taking risks and weighs the advantages against the disadvantages. However, you didn't clearly state your stance on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Make sure to clearly express your opinion on the matter.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Begin your essay by introducing the topic and your position, and end it by summarizing your main points and restating your opinion. Additionally, some of your supporting points could be further developed and connected to each other to improve the overall coherence of your essay.
Lexical Resource
Your essay demonstrates a satisfactory range of vocabulary, but there is room for improvement. Try to incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary to enhance your expression and convey your ideas more effectively.
Grammatical Range
Your essay shows a good control of grammar with only a few errors. However, you could further enhance your grammatical range by using more complex sentence structures and a wider range of grammatical features.