• Some students found some subjects such as mathematics, philosophy are difficult, so these subjects should be optional instead of compulsory. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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these days, a group of young people have a matter with learning several subjects namely, math, philosophy, and so on, so they believe that these items ought to be selected by the students not decision-making for all of them. I subscribe to
this
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perspective owing to the fact that the public has various talents and helps society to have healthy members. On the one side, the fact
that is
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really crucial that psychologists discover is that people do not have the same ability as each other inasmuch as humans have 8 different IQs and some of them are more active than others. In fact, people need to choose the field that they have the ability in to improve their skills and become the best person in it
instead
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of spending too much not only money but
also
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time on the subjects that they do not have talent in .
As a result
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, flexible choice is the best method of raising the best workers in various sections to develop the country faster. On the other side, when the public invests their time in programs of studies that they cannot learn like others, they stress out and sense of disappointment.
In other words
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, after a long run,
this
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anxiety and negative feelings influence their mental health;
consequently
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, in the future, the populations have a number of communities who do not follow the work because they think that they are not able to do it.
In addition
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, the figure of individuals who spend a lot of time in therapy will climb.
To sum up
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, when the youth can choose the subjects that they like and have the ability in there, they can become professional workers that develop their countries quickly in their occupations and society does not have a lot of members that have mental health issues.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Try to include specific examples or evidence that support your points. This adds credibility and weight to your argument, enhancing your task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps the reader understand your stance and main points right from the start.
task achievement
You have addressed the task effectively by explaining why you agree with making certain subjects optional, focusing on individual talents and mental health.
task achievement
Your discussion on the individual differences in talents (mentioning multiple IQs) is insightful and contributes to a strong argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • personalized learning
  • diverse interests
  • strengths
  • flexibility
  • enhance motivation
  • logical reasoning
  • problem-solving skills
  • critical thinking
  • ethical reasoning
  • stress reduction
  • mental health
  • supportive environment
  • balanced education
  • holistic development
  • well-rounded knowledge
  • educational inequalities
  • disadvantaged backgrounds
  • comprehensive education
  • future opportunities
  • advanced studies
  • foundational
  • career choices
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